¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

dream vacation to me

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*Çù
2021-12-20 136

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My dream destination is the universe.
I want to see the Earth in space before I die.
It's time to travel space through a project called Space x.
Science and technology have made a lot of progress in such a short time.
Until now, only a few number of people can buy expensive space travel tickets, but soon there will be packages that can leave the Earth.
It has been expressed and recorded a lot in movies and videos, but I want to see it with my own eyes.
When I was young, my dream was to become an astronaut and a scientist.
I didn't achieve that dream, but I'm always sad.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Evan:) 

That is a great dream. I think once in our lives we have dreamed of being an astronaut. We would have always wanted to know what it's like up there. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

My dream destination is the universe.
>> CORRECT

I want to see the Earth in space before I die.
>> I want to see the Earth from space before I die.

It's time to travel space through a project called Space x.
>> It's time to travel space through a project called "Space X".

Science and technology have made a lot of progress in such a short time.
>>Science and technology have made a lot of progress in such short time.

Until now, only a few number of people can buy expensive space travel tickets, but soon there will be packages that can leave the Earth.
>> Until now, only a few people can buy expensive space travel tickets, but soon there will be packages that can let us leave Earth.

It has been expressed and recorded a lot in movies and videos, but I want to see it with my own eyes.
>> It has been expressed and recorded in a lot in movies and videos, but I want to see it with my own eyes.

When I was young, my dream was to become an astronaut and a scientist.
>> CORRECT

I didn't achieve that dream, but I'm always sad.
>> I didn't achieve that dream, so I'm always sad.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114365 Would you rather be rich or famous? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-02 1
114364 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-02 253
114363 I can do it!!!!!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 155
114362 How would you describe a very relaxing vacation? ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 222
114361 What do you do during your company meetings? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 3
114360 Birth day is my special day. ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 598
114359 What is your favorite place in your city and why? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 258
114358 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 142
114357 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 128
114356 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 459
114355 if i can change my personality ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 201
114354 break my day routine ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 1
114353 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 243
114352 How can you live a stress-free life? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 862
114351 The best present for my parents ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 279
114350 Omicron Virus Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 178
114349 Christmas:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 166
114348 What do you and your family usually do during Christmas? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 175
114347 Do you have healthy eating habits? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 3
114346 Correction RQ if any. ¼­*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-12-01 7

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04