¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In other countries, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people wher

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-12-21 292

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is the most controversial issues in aging society. The elderly population are getting increase continually due to low birth rate. Senior care center, apartment and hospitals can be good solution to solve health problem of old people. One of the well-established facility is retirement village which provide medical services and is facilitated with various activity rooms such as billiard club, singing room and gym. Old people can spend their time doing selective activities they like and have a chance to make friends who have similar concerns. Although, these center can provide the best care, expenses are difficult problem because of the high price service. I don't think most young people aren't willing to pay for elderly as they might not get these services from their descendants due to their family plans. Recently, many couples tend to be living without babies. In addition, young people have been pushed to pay taxes for old people but there won't be enough people to support them .

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello! ^^ Thanks for the class today! ^^ I hope to participate in Kimjang festival too! kkk Enjoy your the rest of December!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
It is the most controversial issue in the aging society. 
>>> CORRECT
The elderly population are getting increase continually due to low birth rate.
>>> The elderly's population is increasing continuously due to low birth rate.
 Senior care center, apartment and hospitals can be good solution to solve health problem of old people. 
>>>  Providing senior care center, apartment and hospitals can be good solutions to solve the health problem of old people. 
One of the well-established facility is retirement village which provide medical services and is facilitated with various activity rooms such as billiard club, singing room and gym. 
>>> One of the well-established facilities is retirement village which provides medical services and is facilitated with various activity rooms such as billiard club, singing room and gym. 
Old people can spend their time doing selective activities they like and have a chance to make friends who have similar concerns.
>>> CORRECT
 Although, these center can provide the best care, expenses are difficult problem because of the high price service. 
>>> CORRECT
I don't think most young people aren't willing to pay for the elderly as they might not get these services from their descendants due to their family plans.
>>> CORRECT
 Recently, many couples tend to be living without babies.
>>> CORRECT
 In addition, young people have been pushed to pay taxes for old people but there won't be enough people to support them .
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113630 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-07 449
113629 Tell us about a memorable, enjoyable, or strange dream you\'ve... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-06 337
113628 Affect bad effect to penguins ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-06 461
113627 Tell Me About a Time You Demonstrated Leadership Skills. ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-06 411
113626 Have you ever been on a team where someone was not pulling their... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-06 518
113625 How do you handle working with people who annoy you? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-06 429
113624 What is your greatest failure, and what did you learn from it? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-06 375
113623 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-06 379
113622 Are you a friendly person? Answer in a few sentences ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-06 325
113621 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 681
113620 Daniel\'s first draft (Name :We could do with giving each... ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 647
113619 Language ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 454
113618 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 378
113617 Why do you think people in Korea do not want to marry nowadays? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 2
113616 What role do you want to play when you get married and have a... ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 2
113615 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 425
113614 I\'m just usual, fine friend ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 320
113613 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 1
113612 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 291
113611 What website do you often use and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 398

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04