¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If Korea getting together

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-12-22 589

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

North Korea and South Korea is still war.
Just having rest time.
If North Korea and South Korea belong together, the first thing government need to solve is a separate family live together again.
When I was a student, teacher show us to the movie title is at class.
I saw a movie's one scene is a separate family meeting scene.
It's feel like so cruel, and just sad.
It's ridiculous to say goodbye to family.
And if our country getting together, I think we should resolve that problem first.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:) 

I also hope that North Korea and South Korea would unite as well. Although, I think there would also be disadvantages to this. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

North Korea and South Korea is still war.
>> North Korea and South Korea are still at war. 

Just having rest time.
>> They are just on rest. 

If North Korea and South Korea belong together, the first thing government need to solve is a separate family live together again.
>> If the two countries will unite, the first thing that the government should do is to reunite separated families. 

When I was a student, teacher show us to the movie title is <±¹Á¦½ÃÀå> at class.
>> When I was a student, teacher showed us a movie called "±¹Á¦½ÃÀå" 

I saw a movie's one scene is a separate family meeting scene.
>> One scene in the movie involved separating a family. 

It's feel like so cruel, and just sad.
>> It was so cruel and sad. 

It's ridiculous to say goodbye to family.
>> It's ridiculous to say goodbye to your family.

And if our country getting together, I think we should resolve that problem first.
>> And if our country reunites again, I think we should resolve that problem first.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113799 homework ³²*¸¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 322
113798 homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 277
113797 Do you think people who are 12-17 years old should already get... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 0
113796 1111 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 1
113795 How would you describe your country¡¯s food? ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 410
113794 Apology ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 335
113793 How do you feel about tourists who visit your country? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 0
113792 Letter ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 313
113791 Essay ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 359
113790 Homework Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 1
113789 Do you like branded things? ¼Õ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 0
113788 why is the sky and the ocean blue explain in your own words. À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 2
113787 Prevention is better than cure. ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 367
113786 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 324
113785 12-17 years old children. ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 407
113784 homework ¾È*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 251
113783 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 349
113782 Homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 2
113781 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 395
113780 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04