¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How is the law enforcement in your city?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2021-12-23 297

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First of all, I brief on my country's law enforcement. My country has a relatively unified and intergrated approach to law enforcement. For example, The National Police Agency(NPA) provides all policing service for people across the country. So local police organizations are directly under the NPA, based on the unitary system.

In addition, there are some independent agencies that enforce a specific law or laws such as some orgarnizaions under Ministry of Justice and Ministry of Economy and Finance. For example, they enforce laws for border control or taxation and so on. But they are not called police in Korea.

The organizaions enforcing laws are most concerned with the punishment of crimes, but they also try to prevent crimes and dicourage a wide range of non-criminal violation of rules and norms through the imposition of less severe dealings such as probation.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Steve! You did an amazing job!  You have delivered your ideas in an orderly way. Keep it up!

- Debbie

First of all, I brief on my country's law enforcement.
>> First of all, I will brief you on my country's law enforcement.

My country has a relatively unified and intergrated approach to law enforcement. 
>> My country has a relatively unified and integrated approach to law enforcement. 

For example, The National Police Agency(NPA) provides all policing service for people across the country. 
>> This is a good sentence.

So local police organizations are directly under the NPA, based on the unitary system.
>> Therefore, the local police organizations are directly under the NPA, based on the unitary system.

In addition, there are some independent agencies that enforce a specific law or laws such as some orgarnizaions under Ministry of Justice and Ministry of Economy and Finance. 
>> In addition, there are some independent agencies that enforce a specific law or laws, such as some of the organizations under The Ministry of Justice and The Ministry of Economy and Finance.

For example, they enforce laws for border control or taxation and so on. 
>> This is a good sentence.

But they are not called police in Korea.
>> However, they are not called police in Korea.

The organizaions enforcing laws are most concerned with the punishment of crimes, but they also try to prevent crimes and dicourage a wide range of non-criminal violation of rules and norms through the imposition of less severe dealings such as probation.
>> The organizations enforcing laws are most concerned with the punishment of crimes, but they also try to prevent crimes and discourage a wide range of non-criminal violation of rules and norms through the imposition of less severe dealings such as probation.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116795 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 0
116794 Cell-phone is successful result of technology ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 0
116793 \"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man how... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 540
116792 what do you usually do with your family? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 607
116791 How does cheating affect our educational system? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 2
116790 How can the government assist in promoting being a vegetarian? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 4
116789 What is a \"bucket list\"? What are 5 things on your bucket list? ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 1008
116788 homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 881
116787 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 1211
116786 Could you compare yourself to a thing? What is it? and Why? ÁÖ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 1051
116785 If you could give advice to Korea\'s next president, what would... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 1225
116784 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 1115
116783 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 602
116782 What do you think is the best company to work at in your country... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 1014
116781 Are instant noodles unhealthy? Why? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 4
116780 The weekend of the third. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 2
116779 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 826
116778 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 2
116777 Claire\'s Homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 447
116776 ESSAY Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-24 583

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04