¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What advice would you like to give to your old self and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*ÁÖ
2021-12-24 149

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What advice would you like to give to your old self and why?

I did have regrets about my old self, sometimes I want to turn back to the past.
If I returned to the past, I will make dreams and I am trying to achieve my dreams.
When I was young, I just studied without purpose.
I didn't think about my dream what I would like to be something.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Monica :) 

There are things that we would like to change in our past. Sometimes we feel regret but often times, it helps us grow into a better person. There is a saying that experiences are the best teachers so we should be thankful for the things in the past. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I did have regrets about my old self, sometimes I want to turn back to the past.
>> I did have regrets about my old self and sometimes I want to turn back to the past.

If I returned to the past, I will make dreams and I am trying to achieve my dreams.
>> If I will return to the past, I will make my dreams come try. 

When I was young, I just studied without purpose.
>> CORRECT

I didn't think about my dream what I would like to be something.
>> I didn't focus picking what I would like to be in the future.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114842 What sport ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-18 2
114841 I like that!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 576
114840 Apartment is better to live ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 138
114839 What music is not very pleasant for you? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 2
114838 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 179
114837 What are some of the ill effects of poor sleep? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 573
114836 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 150
114835 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 141
114834 What do you eat when you sad? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 317
114833 I want to change my curtain. ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 187
114832 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 183
114831 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114830 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114829 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114828 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114827 Is it easy for you to make friends? Why or why not? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 1
114826 Does education guarantee a good job? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 155
114825 For many Korean high school seniors, winter is the season for... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 1
114824 Do you keep plants inside your house? Why or why not? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 154
114823 Samsung\'s bespoken water purifier becomes first to remove... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04