¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The Impact of Fishing Industry

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿µ
2021-12-27 1359

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Avove 50% of marine plastic is abandoned net. Fishes and Whales are dissappearing due to overfishing. Coral reefs are dying, not just because of global warming and ocean acidification, but mainly by lack of food which is coming from fishes.
These are the information from the documentary 'Seaspiracy'. I think fishing is causing considerable problems, and i really should reduce seafood for more than 90%.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Justine!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


Avove 50% of marine plastic is abandoned net. 

>> Above 50% of marine plastics are abandoned nets. 

Fishes and Whales are dissappearing due to overfishing.

 >> Fishes and whales are disappearing due to overfishing

Coral reefs are dying, not just because of global warming and ocean acidification, but mainly by lack of food which is coming from fishes.

>> Coral reefs are dying, not just because of global warming and ocean acidification, but mainly, by lack of food which comes from fishes.
These are the information from the documentary 'Seaspiracy'. 

>> These are the information from the documentary, 'Seaspiracy'. 

I think fishing is causing considerable problems, and i really should reduce seafood for more than 90%.

>> I think fishing is causing considerable amount of problems, and it really should be reduced for more than 90%.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114844 What do you think should the government of South Korea do with... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-19 0
114843 Education:Necessary,but not Everything ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-18 379
114842 What sport ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-18 2
114841 I like that!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 612
114840 Apartment is better to live ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 150
114839 What music is not very pleasant for you? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 2
114838 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 197
114837 What are some of the ill effects of poor sleep? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 591
114836 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 218
114835 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 167
114834 What do you eat when you sad? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 359
114833 I want to change my curtain. ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 208
114832 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 236
114831 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114830 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114829 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114828 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114827 Is it easy for you to make friends? Why or why not? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 1
114826 Does education guarantee a good job? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 211
114825 For many Korean high school seniors, winter is the season for... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04