¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think that Christmas should be an important holiday in South Korea? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-12-28 162

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think some Koreans can think that Christmas is an important holiday, and others may not.
Becuase we celebrate the birth of Jesus in Christmas and christians celebrate it.
Other religiouses may not think Christmas is important, and also they might not want to celebrate the holiday.
If in South Korea, the most people are christians, we can think that Christmas is an important holiday.
But in South Korea, there are various kinds of religiouses so I think we can't think that Christmas is one of the most important holidays in South Korea.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:) 

That is true! These holidays are based on our religion. We have our own ways on how we celebrate them. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think some Koreans can think that Christmas is an important holiday, and others may not.
>>  I think some Koreans thing that Christmas is important and others don't. 

Becuase we celebrate the birth of Jesus in Christmas and christians celebrate it.
>> On Christmas, we celebrate the birth of Jesus which Christians and Catholics honor. 

Other religiouses may not think Christmas is important, and also they might not want to celebrate the holiday.
>>People with other religions may think that Christmas is important, and some may not want to celebrate it. 

If in South Korea, the most people are christians, we can think that Christmas is an important holiday.
>> In  South Korea, most people are Christians, so  we think that Christmas is an important holiday.

But in South Korea, there are various kinds of religiouses so I think we can't think that Christmas is one of the most important holidays in South Korea.
>> But in South Korea, there are various kinds of religions so I think Christmas is one of the most important holidays in South Korea.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114944 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 260
114943 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114942 Why do you think eating fish is good for you? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114941 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114940 What worry do you have nowadays? What good advice can you give... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 166
114939 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 274
114938 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 217
114937 home work(¼÷Á¦) ÃÖ*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 510
114936 What offers do you always refuse? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 196
114935 What game I play with my mom ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 414
114934 What is the importance of having a close relationship with your... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114933 If Korea getting together ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 437
114932 What do you think will happen if North Korea and South Korea are... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 0
114931 Koreans to go back into lockdown À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114930 What do you enjoy about family reunions? ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 344
114929 What is the difference between complaining and nagging? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 0
114928 Try and Choose ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 472
114927 dESIGN apen for a panda À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 3
114926 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 559
114925 Do you think that beautiful people are more successful in life? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04