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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Do you like working with the public?

작성자: 문*현
2022-01-02 241

회원님의 영작문

I would first need to elaborate on what you mean by the public. If you indicate to the people that I enjoy a collaborative atmosphere working in a group. I believe there could be a lot of information and know-how to learn from other team members. Cooperating with others allows me to equip myself with a more creative idea to tackle the problem. However, working with a broad audience would be a different story if you mean it. In my previous experience, I mostly worked at a private enterprise with a specific client base. If the client base is not segmented, there could be a challenge in pinpointing the demand. I would need to go through significant categorization and segmentation procedures to cater to every request by streamlining the resources. Nevertheless, with the previous opportunities segmentizing different sectors and APAC markets, there would be skill-sets I could transfer back.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thanks for this Aciel!

I would first need to elaborate on what you mean by the public. 
>>> correct 
>>> OR: I would first need an elaboration on what you mean by the public.  
If you indicate to the people that I enjoy a collaborative atmosphere working in a group. 
>>> OR: If it is referring to the people that I enjoy a collaborative atmosphere working with in a group.   
I believe there could be a lot of information and know-how to learn from other team members. 
>>> correct  
Cooperating with others allows me to equip myself with a more creative idea to tackle the problem. 
>>> correct     
However, working with a broad audience would be a different story if you mean it. 
>>>  correct  
>>> OR: However, working with a broad audience would be a different story if that's what you mean.
>>> OR: However, working with a broad audience would be a different story if that's what you are referring to.   
In my previous experience, I mostly worked at a private enterprise with a specific client base. 
>>> correct    
If the client base is not segmented, there could be a challenge in pinpointing the demand. 
>>> correct    
I would need to go through significant categorization and segmentation procedures to cater to every request by streamlining the resources. 
>>> correct    
Nevertheless, with the previous opportunities segmentizing different sectors and APAC markets, there would be skill-sets I could transfer back.
>>>   Nevertheless, with the previous opportunities segmenting different sectors and APAC markets, there would be skill-sets I could transfer back.

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