¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you usually wish for during your birthday?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-01-03 385

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Actually, I don't wish anything during my birthday.
But I have to, I will wish something about me.
Because If it is Christmas or other big holiday, I will wish something for my family and friends, but it is my birthday so I wanna wish something about me.
And also if there are big events or very sad events, I will wish about them.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:) 

Wishing has already been a tradition whenever it's someone's birthday. It's actually fun. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Actually, I don't wish anything during my birthday.
>> Actually, I don't wish for anything on my birthday.

But I have to, I will wish something about me.
>> But if I have to, I will wish for something for myself. 

Because If it is Christmas or other big holiday, I will wish something for my family and friends, but it is my birthday so I wanna wish something about me.
>> If it's an important holiday, I usually with something for my family and friends. But since it's my birthday, I will wish something for myself. 

And also if there are big events or very sad events, I will wish about them
>> Also, if there were big or sad events, I will wish something regarding those. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116530 When I got a job, I moved out of my parents\' house. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116529 Is giving a good first impression important? ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116528 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 431
116527 How do you feel and what do you do after a long vacation?... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 0
116526 How do you feel and what do you do after a long vacation?... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 542
116525 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116524 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 403
116523 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 489
116522 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 2
116521 What are some things about the eating habits you want to change? ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 589
116520 HOMEWORK: What are your favorite foods? / What should we eat... ¼­*¾È ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 471
116519 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 1
116518 The advantages and disadvantages. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 3
116517 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 713
116516 yummy~ ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 8
116515 . ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 535
116514 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 447
116513 homework.7 ¾ç*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 825
116512 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 751
116511 homework ½Å*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-17 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04