¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the best way for a country to bring in more tourists?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-01-05 875

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If our country lets people around the world know well about tourist attractions in our country, people can enjoy our tourist attractions more easily. It is because the more we know about it, the more we can enjoy it. We need to make more Youtube contents introducing Korean cultures in English.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Steve! The overall content of your work is comprehensible. Terrific! However, remember to use pronouns to replace nouns in your sentences. 

- Debbie


If our country lets people around the world know well about tourist attractions in our country, people can enjoy our tourist attractions more easily. 
>> If we let people from around the world know well about the tourist attractions in our country, they can enjoy them more easily. 

It is because the more we know about it, the more we can enjoy it.
>> It is because the more we know about something, the more we can enjoy it.

We need to make more Youtube contents introducing Korean cultures in English.
>> We need to make more YouTube contents introducing Korean culture in English.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116500 What is one thing you have never done but would like to do? ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 1176
116499 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 0
116498 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 1
116497 Railway vs road ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 841
116496 What are the three things you would like to accomplish/have... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 1
116495 How do you feel and what do you do after a long vacation?... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 633
116494 My favorite fairy tale characters ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 844
116493 Is it important to help other people? Why or why not? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 585
116492 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 501
116491 Do you like dogs? Why do people call the dog, man\'s best friend? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 775
116490 Cafe ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 1
116489 I have seen duck tongue dishes. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 3
116488 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 765
116487 What is your favorite movie and why is that your favorite? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 738
116486 The vegetarian ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 4
116485 25.26.27 ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 692
116484 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 1038
116483 If you had a lot of money, what is the first thing you\'ll buy... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 627
116482 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 11
116481 If you had a lot of money, what is the first thing you\'ll buy... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-16 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04