¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you give money to homeless people? Do you think people should give money to homeless people?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ȯ
2022-01-11 636

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't give money to homeless people. It's because there are places for homeless people in Korea. If they want to go to the places to stay some days, they can go. Even If I give money to homeless people, the money won't be a good solution for them. In my opinion, making a fund is better than giving money. After establishing the fund, people can donate to the fund. We should make a plan for homeless people. If I give money to homeless people, the money will help homeless people to stay on the street.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good afternoon Hwanny! 
Your essay today is impressive. You've created a lot of good sentences and I'm really happy about it. 
Keep it up!
See you in class later. ^^
~Teacher Charry

I don't give money to homeless people. 
>> CORRECT!
It's because there are places for homeless people in Korea. 
>> CORRECT!
If they want to go to the places to stay some days, they can go. 
>> If they need a temporary shelter, they can go to those places. 
Even If I give money to homeless people, the money won't be a good solution for them. 
>> CORRECT!
In my opinion, making a fund is better than giving money. 
>> In my opinion, starting a fund raising program is better than giving money. 
After establishing the fund, people can donate to the fund. 
>> After establishing a fund raising program, people can donate in it. 
We should make a plan for homeless people. 
>> CORRECT!
If I give money to homeless people, the money will help homeless people to stay on the street.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114213 Argument ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 733
114212 I bought a new smart phone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 393
114211 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 480
114210 ÈÞ°­°ü·Ã Á¤*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 386
114209 Customer realtionship ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 376
114208 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 0
114207 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 357
114206 If you were going to be a teacher, where would you like to teach? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 3
114205 I think Seoul is the best city in Korea. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 286
114204 The meaning of Having children to me. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 377
114203 food recommendation for foreigners. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 989
114202 What are the things that you love to buy? Explain why. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 0
114201 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 321
114200 email related to my work ÃÖ*¿µ ÁøÇàÁß 2021-11-26 1
114199 Blue Whale 🐳 ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 484
114198 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 374
114197 How could you decline offers of help politely? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 666
114196 Do you like to be busy, or do you like to have an easy schedule?... ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 495
114195 What are the things that you love to buy? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 2078
114194 Tell me about the most beautiful place in Korea. ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-26 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04