¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ȯ
2022-01-13 1152

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that wealthy nations have to share their wealth among poorer nations. Poor nations want to become rich nations. While they are trying to make money, nature will be destroyed. For example, many experts said, Amazon is a lung of the earth, but Brazil cuts woods to expand industrial area. To keep amazon is worthy for all creature on earth. If wealthy nations share money to Brazil, Brazil doesn't need to develop their country.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening Hwanny! :)
Thank you for taking the time to write an essay. 
I agree that wealthy nations should share a part of their wealth to very poor nations. 
However, I don't think that alone would end the problem on poverty. 
I think wealthier nations should share to poorer nations their economic strategies on how to become rich.
If the poorer nations have the means to do it, it is guaranteed that they would also become rich and won't need to receive financial assistance from richer countries. 
Anyhow, that's just my opinion about it. 
I hope you're doing great. See you again tomorrow. :)
~Teacher Charry

I think that wealthy nations have to share their wealth among poorer nations. 
>> CORRECT!
Poor nations want to become rich nations. 
>> CORRECT!
While they are trying to make money, nature will be destroyed. 
>> While they are trying to make money, their natural resources will be depleted and their environment gets destroyed.
For example, many experts said, Amazon is a lung of the earth, but Brazil cuts woods to expand industrial area. 
>> For example, many experts said that the Amazon is the lung of the Earth but Brazilians destroys the forest to expand their industrial areas. 
To keep amazon is worthy for all creature on earth. 
>> Preserving the Amazon is vital for all creatures on Earth.  
If wealthy nations share money to Brazil, Brazil doesn't need to develop their country.
>> If wealthy nations share their wealth to Brazil, Brazilians don't need to destroy the Amazon forest to develop their country.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115518 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 2
115517 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 266
115516 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 525
115515 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 595
115514 Government¡¯s Help ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 237
115513 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 1
115512 Do you think learning how to play an instrument is important?... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 2
115511 homework ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 1
115510 Essay(Jan 12th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 269
115509 What did you do last weekend? What will you do this weekend? Do... Á¤*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 4
115508 What are popular things people enjoy doing in your country... Á¤*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 401
115507 Do men typically drink more than women in your country? Why do... ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 582
115506 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 452
115505 Make a sentence using the given -ing words. ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 243
115504 How necessary is it to ask for permission? ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 380
115503 Have a nice day! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 370
115502 What can you do to avoid getting sick? ÇÑ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 739
115501 What\'s your favorite holiday food? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 1
115500 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 3
115499 How often do you go shopping? What are the items you normally... ¹®*Çý ¿Ï·á 2022-01-12 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04