¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you could travel back in time, where would you go?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-01-13 330

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

(I don't know if I got it right.) If I can travel back in time, I will go the time which I can change my life because I want to change my life and I don't want to regret me of the past. I will travel back the time, I will do my best to do many tasks successfully. Like this, the advantage of traveling back is being able to change my life, but the disadvantage is also being able to change my life. So, if I travel back in time, I will feel scared. But I'm interested in this topic. Due to my interest, I will be able to enjoy it. Now, It is impossible, but clearly, a day which it is possible will come. I'm looking forward to the day.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kimberly:) 

Our experiences are the ones that makes us the person we are right now. You shouldn't have any regrets because you are a great person right now. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

If I can travel back in time, I will go the time which I can change my life because I want to change my life and I don't want to regret me of the past. 
>> If I can travel back in time, I will go the time which I can reset my life so that I won't have any regrets.

I will travel back the time, I will do my best to do many tasks successfully. 
>> CORRECT

Like this, the advantage of traveling back is being able to change my life, but the disadvantage is also being able to change my life.
>> Like this, the advantage of traveling back is being able to change my life, but the disadvantage changing it as well. 

So, if I travel back in time, I will feel scared. 
>> So if I traveled back in time, I will feel scared. 

But I'm interested in this topic. 
>> CORRECT

Due to my interest, I will be able to enjoy it. 
>> CORRECT

Now, It is impossible, but clearly, a day which it is possible will come. 
>> Now, it is impossible but one day it might be. 

I'm looking forward to the day.
>> I am looking forward to that day. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115024 What are your favorite customs? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-26 2
115023 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-26 376
115022 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-26 651
115021 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-26 4
115020 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-26 0
115019 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-26 0
115018 My problem ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-26 2
115017 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-26 1
115016 Lie ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 307
115015 Is there a right time to give up and stop trying? or should you... ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 2
115014 My brother\'s advantage ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 379
115013 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 286
115012 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 149
115011 What advice would you like to give to your old self and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 157
115010 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 1
115009 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 157
115008 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 251
115007 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 128
115006 My Bad Memory ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 325
115005 12/17 ³ë*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 203

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04