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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

It is very good story for people

작성자: 김*우
2022-01-13 559

회원님의 영작문

If I introduce this story to foreign friends, I will say them that 'This story is looked very simple, but there are lots of sayings in here.'. Frankly ,lots of people know this story that 'hung bu is nice but nol bu is bad person'. However, there are advantages of Nol bu, and there are cons of Hung bu. I will explain what the pros and cons of Nol bu and Hung bu are.
First, one of the pros of Nol bu is sense of economy. Frankly, Nol bu saved lots of things in advance. He saved money, and rice. Later, Nol bu could be very rich man. There was the money that get by wrong way, but he managed money well and saved a lot.
Second, one of the cons of Hung bu is opposite with Nol bu's pro. Hung bu didn't save anything because he was so kind, and he despaired too a lot without any plans.
In conclusion, people have to be nice, but people have to have cool cheek, too. So I recommend this story.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용


Hi, Daniel! Thank you for an impressive work.  You were able to reflect on the main characters' strengths and weaknesses. Awesome! Keep up the good job!

- Teacher Debbie

If I introduce this story to foreign friends, I will say them that 'This story is looked very simple, but there are lots of sayings in here.'.
>> If I told this story to my foreign friends, I would say, "This story is very simple, but there are lots of lessons from this."

Frankly, lots of people know this story that 'hung bu is nice but nol bu is bad person'.
>> Lots of people know that Hung Bu is a good person, and Nol Bu is a bad person. 

However, there are advantages of Nol bu, and there are cons of Hung bu.
>> However, Nol Bu has strengths, and Hung Bu has weaknesses.

I will explain what the pros and cons of Nol bu and Hung bu are.
>> I will explain what their strengths and weaknesses are.

First, one of the pros of Nol bu is sense of economy.
>> One of Nol Bu's strengths is his sense of economy.

Frankly, Nol bu saved lots of things in advance.
>> He saved lots of things in advance.

He saved money, and rice.
>> This is a good sentence.

Later, Nol bu could be very rich man.
>> Because of this, he became a very rich man.

There was the money that get by wrong way, but he managed money well and saved a lot.
>> He got his money the wrong way, but he managed and saved it.

Second, one of the cons of Hung bu is opposite with Nol bu's pro.
>> Next is Hung Bu's weakness.

Hung bu didn't save anything because he was so kind, and he despaired too a lot without any plans.
>> Hung Bu didn't save anything because he was so kind, and he was in despair because he didn't plan ahead.

In conclusion, people have to be nice, but people have to have cool cheek, too. 
>> In conclusion, people have to be nice, but they have to be bold, too.

So I recommend this story.
>> I recommend this story.
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전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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