¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ø
2022-01-16 541

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Kindly answer the following in essay form.
How do you think can we encourage people to take the COVID-19 vaccine?

I think COVID-19 vaccine should be more effective. It is because there are many COVID-19 patients who are vaccinated. These examples of breakthrough infection are continually occurring now. So I can't believe COVID-19 vaccine's effects.
Also COVID-19 vaccine causes many side effects. Actually I experienced that after vaccinated booster shot, that's so painful to me. So I think that's why some people reject to get the vaccine. It is necessary to be better than now.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Won:) 

Yes, that is true. There are some side effects to it. I experienced it myself but I think the purpose of the vaccine now is to lessen the effects of the virus and not lead us to being hospitalized. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I think COVID-19 vaccine should be more effective. 
>> I think COVID-19 vaccines should be more effective. 

It is because there are many COVID-19 patients who are vaccinated.
>> It is because there are still many COVID-19 patients who got infected even if they are already vaccinated. 

These examples of breakthrough infection are continually occurring now. 
>> CORRECT

So I can't believe COVID-19 vaccine's effects.
>> So, I don't believe that the vaccine is effective. 

Also COVID-19 vaccine causes many side effects. 
>> Also, the COVID-19 vaccine causes many side effects. 

Actually I experienced that after vaccinated booster shot, that's so painful to me. 
>> Actually, I experienced it when I got the booster shot. It was so painful for me. 

So I think that's why some people reject to get the vaccine. 
>> So I think that this is why a lot of people refuse to get the vaccine. 

It is necessary to be better than now.
>> CORRECT

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115123 What future risk do you want to try in your career? Answer in a... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 273
115122 If you could relive one moment in your life, what would it be? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 368
115121 Hello~ ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 3
115120 What is your comfort food and why? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 333
115119 I will miss my friends ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 530
115118 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 368
115117 What I\'m grateful for this Christmas.. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 492
115116 If i keep studying so far. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 244
115115 A memory that I want to forget. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 680
115114 free topic ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 388
115113 Can you think of two things you were happy about from this year,... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 274
115112 What are some New Year\'s revolutions you have made in the past? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 454
115111 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 294
115110 What traditions do you have during the Christmas season? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 448
115109 Ran out ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 1
115108 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 235
115107 Do you think skin color affects whether a person is regarded as... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 267
115106 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 349
115105 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 4
115104 Cost of living top economic issue next year in Seoul : Survey À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-29 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04