무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Are simple joys as valuable as complex experiences?

작성자: 김*환
2022-01-16 323

회원님의 영작문

I think that, simple joys are as valuable as complex experiences. When I was younger than now, doing complex experiences needed small mount of money. That time, I didn't know that how much other people spend for having complex experiences. I had been satisfied on my experiences. But now, I know how much other people spend money for their experiences. If I try to experience as much as other people do, I need lots of money. So, I don't go camping, I never buy a low grade of Mac book. If then, what makes me happy? I try to make simple joys. For example, trying to find tasty coffee beans. I found out a web site about coffee. I have bought various countries's coffee beans. It is my simple joys. It doesn't need small a lot of money.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Hwanny! :)
Thank you for answering this question. 
It is true that simple joys are as important as the complex ones. Most people think that in order to be happy, you have to have money all the time. 
Although I agree that money is essential, there are some things that money can't buy. 
Anyhow, I hope you're having a great afternoon. 
See you in class later. ^^
~Teacher Charry

I think that, simple joys are as valuable as complex experiences. 
>> CORRECT!
When I was younger than now, doing complex experiences needed small mount of money. 
>> When I was younger, doing complex experiences needed a small mount of money.
That time, I didn't know that how much other people spend for having complex experiences. 
>> [DO YOU MEAN]: That time, I didn't know that other people spent that much to have those complex experiences.
I had been satisfied on my experiences. 
>> I was satisfied of my experiences. 
But now, I know how much other people spend money for their experiences. 
>> But now I know how much other people spend for their experiences. 
If I try to experience as much as other people do, I need lots of money. 
>> If I would try to experience as much as other people do, I would need lots of money.
So, I don't go camping, I never buy a low grade of Mac book. 
>> So, I don't go camping and I never buy a low grade Mac book.
If then, what makes me happy? 
>> If so, then what makes me happy?
I try to make simple joys. 
>> CORRECT!
For example, trying to find tasty coffee beans. 
>> For example, I try to find tasty coffee beans.
I found out a web site about coffee. 
>> I found  a website about coffee.
I have bought various countries's coffee beans. 
>> I have bought various countries' coffee beans from that website. 
It is my simple joys. 
>> It is my simple joy.
It doesn't need small a lot of money.
>> It doesn't need a lot of money. 
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
115274 Homework 박*은 완료 2022-01-05 1
115273 Wednesday Homework 류*우 완료 2022-01-05 531
115272 Personality 문*빈 완료 2022-01-05 952
115271 kku`s homwork 강*이 완료 2022-01-05 8
115270 Homework 김*혁 완료 2022-01-05 504
115269 Homework 강*선 완료 2022-01-05 502
115268 If I can invent something 이*은 완료 2022-01-05 772
115267 What kind of traditional food do you eat for Thanksgiving? 안*원 완료 2022-01-05 714
115266 Why people say \"there is no place like home\" 변*원 완료 2022-01-05 182
115265 What are some positive ways people deal with stress? 박*연 완료 2022-01-05 1004
115264 Homework 이*빈 완료 2022-01-05 631
115263 homework - the four-day workweek 김*아 완료 2022-01-05 1
115262 homework 김*아 완료 2022-01-05 278
115261 E-mail) Update test standard 이*우 완료 2022-01-05 881
115260 Do you think women need a lot of clothes? 이*현 완료 2022-01-05 244
115259 Make 5 sentences using me and 5 sentences using I. 황*하 완료 2022-01-05 1392
115258 How do you keep in touch with people you don\'t get to see often? 금*진 완료 2022-01-05 1558
115257 Homework 함*주 완료 2022-01-05 2
115256 Too light a punishment? 유*진 완료 2022-01-05 2
115255 Where do you see yourself in ten, twenty, and fifty years from... 양*빈 완료 2022-01-05 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]