¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What special features do you think should be added to computers? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-01-17 936

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Computer is already perfect but I think cameras should be added to computers. When I took an online class, I could listen to my friends' sayings. They said that "I'm taking the classes with computer so, I can't turn on the camera". Through this sayings, I could think that the cameras should be added to computers. If the cameras are added to computers, clearly, many students will be able to participate well in the classes. Also, they will be able to take the classes effectively. I hope that my saying can be made come true.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:) 

That's a great point. It would be less hassle if it had a camera on it. There are some other options as well like putting a webcam on it. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

Computer is already perfect but I think cameras should be added to computers. 
>> Computers are already perfect but I think there should be cameras added to it. 

When I took an online class, I could listen to my friends' sayings. 
>> When I take online classes, I can only hear what my friends are saying. 

They said that "I'm taking the classes with computer so, I can't turn on the camera". 
>> They always say that, "I'm taking the classes with a computer so, I can't turn on the camera". 

Through this sayings, I could think that the cameras should be added to computers. 
>> Through this, I could think that the cameras should be added to computers. 

If the cameras are added to computers, clearly, many students will be able to participate well in the classes. 
>> CORRECT

Also, they will be able to take the classes effectively. 
>> CORRECT

I hope that my saying can be made come true.
>> I hope what I am saying will come true. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115005 12/17 ³ë*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 203
115004 12/23 ³ë*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 188
115003 How should parents discipline their children? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 1
115002 Kindly make use of these words in your own sentence. ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 244
115001 Is being a carnivore healthy? Why or why not? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 0
115000 Love yourself¢½ ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 180
114999 I can\'t choose it:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 308
114998 homework ³ë*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 2
114997 Gray for the Unstable Compromise ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 379
114996 Christmas ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 168
114995 What advice would you like to give to your old self and why? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 179
114994 Do you prefer summer vacation or winter vacations? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 2
114993 What does being rejected feels like? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 0
114992 When was the happiest day of your life and why was it very happy? ¼º*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 141
114991 What advice would you like to give to your old self and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 1
114990 What is the best memory you have in school? Explain in detail. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 1
114989 For having a good sleep ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114988 What advice would you like to give to your old self and why? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1238
114987 We should fix our personalities ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 628
114986 In your country, is it important to consider the age and... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04