¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What special features do you think should be added to computers? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-01-17 960

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Computer is already perfect but I think cameras should be added to computers. When I took an online class, I could listen to my friends' sayings. They said that "I'm taking the classes with computer so, I can't turn on the camera". Through this sayings, I could think that the cameras should be added to computers. If the cameras are added to computers, clearly, many students will be able to participate well in the classes. Also, they will be able to take the classes effectively. I hope that my saying can be made come true.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:) 

That's a great point. It would be less hassle if it had a camera on it. There are some other options as well like putting a webcam on it. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

Computer is already perfect but I think cameras should be added to computers. 
>> Computers are already perfect but I think there should be cameras added to it. 

When I took an online class, I could listen to my friends' sayings. 
>> When I take online classes, I can only hear what my friends are saying. 

They said that "I'm taking the classes with computer so, I can't turn on the camera". 
>> They always say that, "I'm taking the classes with a computer so, I can't turn on the camera". 

Through this sayings, I could think that the cameras should be added to computers. 
>> Through this, I could think that the cameras should be added to computers. 

If the cameras are added to computers, clearly, many students will be able to participate well in the classes. 
>> CORRECT

Also, they will be able to take the classes effectively. 
>> CORRECT

I hope that my saying can be made come true.
>> I hope what I am saying will come true. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114706 Is this sentence grammatically correct? °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 246
114705 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 0
114704 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 1
114703 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 0
114702 What do you think about coffee shop hopping? Please give details... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 210
114701 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 0
114700 You sent a lot of questions. I did try to post all of the... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 178
114699 home work ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 176
114698 home work ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 650
114697 What is the benefit of eating healthy? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 2
114696 What is the most famous place for tourists in your country? ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 201
114695 Absolutely language affects thought. ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 1
114694 Many jobs require ongoing training and research to stay... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 223
114693 What is the implication of having an aging population? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 487
114692 What do you think of single adults adopting kids? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 881
114691 Give 5 examples of reptiles you know and you can see in the... ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 1
114690 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 1
114689 diet ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 224
114688 What is your most valued possession? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 2
114687 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 188

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04