¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think that having a lot of money can make you happy? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-01-18 514

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

No, I don't. Because I think having a lot of great people is more important than having a lot of money. Through money, I can do many things, but it can't make me happy. I think feelings are valuable. I can't buy it with a lot of money. Money can't make me happy but it can be a way which I can feel happy. For example, having a lot of money can't make me happy but spending a lot of money for the people around me can make me happy. So, I hope that I will not do bad things to have a lot of money in the future.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kimberly!

Yes, that is true. Money cannot but memories and our happiness but it can be a way for us to be. So at some point, it is still important. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

No, I don't. 
>> No, I don't because I think having a lot of great people is more important than having a lot of money.

Because I think having a lot of great people is more important than having a lot of money.
>> CONNECT WITH THE SENTENCE ABOVE. 

 Through money, I can do many things, but it can't make me happy. 
>> CORRECT

I think feelings are valuable. 
>> I think feelings are more valuable. 

I can't buy it with a lot of money. 
>> CORRECT

Money can't make me happy but it can be a way which I can feel happy. 
>> Money can't make me happy but it can be a way for me to be happy. 

For example, having a lot of money can't make me happy but spending a lot of money for the people around me can make me happy. 
>> CORRECT

So, I hope that I will not do bad things to have a lot of money in the future.
>> So, I hope that I will not do bad things when I have a lot of money in the future. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117428 Do you prefer spending time with family or friends? ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1750
117427 What is the most interesting hobby in your family? ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 897
117426 Writing Task(Mar 15th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 790
117425 Use each expression in a sentence ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1251
117424 Who is your favorite book character? ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1395
117423 Thank you! Donna! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1032
117422 Good evening! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1014
117421 Because of this situation ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1248
117420 My Homeowrk °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 785
117419 Brushing ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 10
117418 Mama\'s boy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1
117417 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 559
117416 Favorite book character ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 965
117415 How do you see yourself 10 years from now? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 529
117414 What do you do to avoid catching COVID-19? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 758
117413 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ÁøÇàÁß 2022-03-16 751
117412 About computers controlling the house. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 485
117411 Losting My Dream Lense ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 430
117410 Do you think you have enough time to do the things you want to... ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 787
117409 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04