¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ø
2022-01-18 926

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Kindly answer the following in essay form.
What special features do you think should be added to computers? Explain your answer.

I think the computer needs fingerprint recognition function. There are many requirements to verify user's identification on the internet.
Nowadays verifying identification is mostly operated messages. It takes a long time and is weak for hacking. So if we can verify our identification through fingerprint recognition function, we can feel faster and safer in certification process.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Won!

I think you have the best answer for this question. Those are very innovative ideas! They can be really helpful for us.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I think the computer needs fingerprint recognition function. 
>> I think computers need fingerprint recognition functions. 

There are many requirements to verify user's identification on the internet.
>> CORRECT

Nowadays verifying identification is mostly operated messages. 
>> Nowadays, verifying identification is mostly operated for messages. 

It takes a long time and is weak for hacking. 
>> It takes a long time and is weak for hackers. 

So if we can verify our identification through fingerprint recognition function, we can feel faster and safer in certification process.
>> So if we can verify our identification through fingerprint recognition function, we can have a safer and faster verification process. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117211 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1166
117210 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1290
117209 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1119
117208 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 0
117207 Horrible things ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1270
117206 I don\'t like any candidate ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1438
117205 What is your all-time favorite movie and what can you learn from... º¯*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 915
117204 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 2
117203 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 2
117202 The worst travel ever and the lesson. ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 802
117201 Korea Presidential election À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1
117200 I would be appreciated if you review the below sentence. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1595
117199 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1178
117198 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1122
117197 I would be appreciated if you review the below sentence. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1221
117196 we should prepare something if possible. ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1251
117195 I would be appreciated if you review the below sentence. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1188
117194 What is your all-time favorite movie and what can you learn from... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 812
117193 2022.3.9 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1045
117192 If you could only read one more book for your entire life, what... ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-10 1059

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04