¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task: Do you think it is important to teach children about being healthy?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*À±
2022-01-21 674

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I think it's important to teach children about being healthy.
Children need to know about health, so they can manage themselves their health.
If children don't know about health, they can destroy their health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ji Yun! 
This is correct! We really have to value the importance of health. 
Health is wealth! 

Yes, I think it's important to teach children about being healthy.
>>> CORRECT!
Children need to know about health, so they can manage themselves their health.
>>> Children need to know about health so that they can manage their health on their own.
If children don't know about health, they can destroy their health.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118580 Why do you think people started living in cities? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 1
118579 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 414
118578 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 501
118577 International sporting events are costly and bring problems to... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 0
118576 Which one do you think is better, electronic books or... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 472
118575 Writing Task(Apr 27th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 454
118574 Writing Task(Apr 26th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 464
118573 Clothes I want to buy. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 412
118572 What is the difference in the sound (tone) of the Korean... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 2
118571 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 434
118570 4/27 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 518
118569 What school policy have you violated in high school? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 480
118568 What\'s the best way to protect yourself from getting infected... ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 466
118567 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 1
118566 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 523
118565 My daily life ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 1
118564 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 1
118563 What was your success story in your company? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 396
118562 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 1
118561 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-27 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04