¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task: Do you think it is important to teach children about being healthy?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*À±
2022-01-21 766

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I think it's important to teach children about being healthy.
Children need to know about health, so they can manage themselves their health.
If children don't know about health, they can destroy their health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ji Yun! 
This is correct! We really have to value the importance of health. 
Health is wealth! 

Yes, I think it's important to teach children about being healthy.
>>> CORRECT!
Children need to know about health, so they can manage themselves their health.
>>> Children need to know about health so that they can manage their health on their own.
If children don't know about health, they can destroy their health.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118271 What do you think of people who complain a lot? ½Å*¼· ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 499
118270 Is setting a deadline important? why do you say so? ½Å*¼· ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 488
118269 I don\\\'t want to be in a rush. ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 600
118268 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 1
118267 According to the article, with the opening of the Seoul Arena,... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 485
118266 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 576
118265 4/14 HOMEWORK ( •̀ ¥ø •́ )y ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 635
118264 What I should do every day but don¡¯t. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 671
118263 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 2
118262 What is the best thing about your birthplace? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 781
118261 What is your greatest childhood memory? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 590
118260 What is something you should do every day but don\'t? And why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 494
118259 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 438
118258 Listen and Take Notes Discussion °­*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 563
118257 It is valued to spend time together. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 0
118256 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 0
118255 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 1
118254 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 489
118253 The best memories ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 540
118252 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 589

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04