무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

ielts task 1

작성자: 송*빈
2022-01-21 1284

회원님의 영작문



The given bar graph gives information about the amount of the minutes in telephone call in the UK in three different categories, between 1995 and 2002.
It is clear that the total number of telephone call in local showed the biggest amount of the minutes in every years.It is also worth pointing out that the most amount of the telephone in three differnet country call steadily increased over 7 years.Looking at the graph more closely, the number of minutes in local is the biggest amount of the total number of minutes at about 70 billions in 1995.Then it gradually increased between 1995 and 1999,and it reached the peak of the graph at 90 billions minutes .However, in 2000, it started to declined by about 85 billions, and it fell continually up to about 70 billions. As far as the national and international call is concerned , it recorded at neally 38 billions in 1995.It gradually grew up by about 20 to 60 billions.When it comes to mobile call, it showed the smallest number of minutes at 3

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Su Bin!
You're really working hard these days.
It would be so good for you to go to your exam prepared.
I believe in you.
Keep it up!^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
The given bar graph gives information about the amount of the minutes in telephone call in the UK in three different categories, between 1995 and 2002.
>> The given bar graph gives information about the number of minutes of telephone calls in the UK in three different categories from 1995 to 2002.
It is clear that the total number of telephone call in local showed the biggest amount of the minutes in every years.
>> It is clear that the total number of local telephone calls showed the biggest number of minutes every year.
It is also worth pointing out that the most amount of the telephone in three differnet country call steadily increased over 7 years.
>> It is also worth pointing out that the highest number of telephone calls in three different countries increased steadily for over 7 years.
Looking at the graph more closely, the number of minutes in local is the biggest amount of the total number of minutes at about 70 billions in 1995.
>> Looking at the graph more closely, the number of minutes of local calls is the biggest amount of the total number of minutes at about 70 billion in 1995.
Then it gradually increased between 1995 and 1999,and it reached the peak of the graph at 90 billions minutes .
>> Then it gradually increased from 1995 to 1999,and it reached its peak at 90 billion minutes .
However, in 2000, it started to declined by about 85 billions, and it fell continually up to about 70 billions. 
>> However, in 2000, it started to declined to 85 billion, and it fell continually up to about 70 billion. 
As far as the national and international call is concerned , it recorded at neally 38 billions in 1995.
>> As far as the national and international calls are concerned , the record shows 38 billion in 1995.
It gradually grew up by about 20 to 60 billions.
>> It gradually grew to about 20 to 60 billion.
When it comes to mobile call, it showed the smallest number of minutes at 3
>> When it comes to mobile calls, it showed the smallest number of minutes at 3 in 1995.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
116464 Do you believe that giving a gift to a special person is... 이*영 완료 2022-02-16 2
116463 When was the last time you were invited? 양*빈 완료 2022-02-16 2
116462 What are the advantages and disadvantages of working with a... 김*지 완료 2022-02-16 934
116461 my major 이*하 완료 2022-02-16 996
116460 What\'s the most memorable vacation you\'ve had? 김*준 완료 2022-02-16 963
116459 202z.2.15 전* 완료 2022-02-16 692
116458 2022.2.14 전* 완료 2022-02-16 881
116457 Do you think it\\\'s healthy to eat out often? Why or why not? 장*수 완료 2022-02-16 1023
116456 homework 박*윤 완료 2022-02-16 839
116455 If you had a lot of money, what is the first thing you\'ll buy... 신*섭 완료 2022-02-16 772
116454 2/15 homework 이*유 완료 2022-02-15 673
116453 How do you maintain your good health? / What do you think is the... 주*빈 완료 2022-02-15 1021
116452 I\'m doing my homework...^^ 박*형 완료 2022-02-15 474
116451 It is the world where many people live together. 김*태 완료 2022-02-15 2
116450 What is your favorite restaurant and why? 김*규 완료 2022-02-15 1
116449 What is the worst news you\'ve ever heard in South Korea?... 박*주 완료 2022-02-15 966
116448 I don\'t believe in fortune tellers. 김*태 완료 2022-02-15 2
116447 How I learn! 이*하 완료 2022-02-15 798
116446 I will make my mother\'s own Bibimbap 김*우 완료 2022-02-15 811
116445 If you had a lot of money, what is the first thing you\'ll buy... 황*별 완료 2022-02-15 747

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]