¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on the environment, eating habits, and

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Àº
2022-01-24 655

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on the environment, eating habits, and families. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

I agree that the junk food effects negatively our environment. The junk food has been using a lot of plastic products and excessive wrapping paper / wrap for only packing. It is the cause environment pollution. Also, fast food is for eating fast like its name. eating habits are also changed us eat fast. These things make us gain fat and indigestion. Moreover, according to eating time with family is decreased, family's relationship become low.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Luel!^^How are you today? I miss you! Thanks for writing your essay!  Remind yourself the REASON why you¡¯re writing. It¡¯s about realizing the value you get from writing. So when you finally understand the ¡°why¡± behind your writing, writing won¡¯t feel like an obstacle.

>>> TEACHER GEMMA

I agree that the junk food effects negatively our environment. 

>>>I agree that junk food affects our environment negatively. 

The junk food has been using a lot of plastic products and excessive wrapping paper / wrap for only packing.

>>> Junk food has been including a lot of plastic products and excessive wrapping paper / wrap for packing.

 It is the cause environment pollution. 

>>>  It is the cause of environment pollution. 

Also, fast food is for eating fast like its name. 

>>> Also, fast food is quick meal like its name. 

eating habits are also changed us eat fast. 

>>> Eating habits have also changed us to eat fast. 

These things make us gain fat and indigestion.

>>> These things make us gain fat and caused indigestion.

 Moreover, according to eating time with family is decreased, family's relationship become low.

>>>  Moreover, eating time with the family has decreased. Family relationship has become so low.



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114972 homework: Where do you usually meet new people? ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1134
114971 Where do tortoises live? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 2
114970 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114969 12/21 ³ë*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1753
114968 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 4922
114967 Have you heard of \"Golden Hello\"? What if a company offers you... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 645
114966 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1
114965 food waste ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 692
114964 What do you and your family like to do together? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 2
114963 What do you think will happen if North Korea and South Korea are... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 607
114962 What kind of cars do you think look the best? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114961 What do you do in order to minimize the use of plastic? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114960 What is the best memory you have in school? Explain in detail. Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 553
114959 NIce!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 517
114958 I don\'t want to be famous ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 332
114957 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 876
114956 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1195
114955 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 339
114954 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 2
114953 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 294

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04