¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

It is easy to be worse the global warming, but it\'s hard to restore

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-01-26 723

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I do a lot of things that can affect to global warming. When I ride a car, then 59 gram of CO2 leak for 1 km. And when I use air conditional in summer, then 258 gram of CO2 leak for hour. Aside from these, I used appliances and transportation and leak lots of CO2 a day. Think that about 7500000000 people live like it. There will be too much CO2 in this world! In addition, there are lots of factories that leak CO2. In the case of a steam power plant, 991 gram of CO2 to produce 1 kWh. Then how can we try not to leak CO2 as possible as small? The way is simple. It's just reducing the frequency of using car and appliances which are not vital. We should use nature. For example, we can use the cool air in the mountain or wind instead of air conditional. And we can ride bike or running instead of car if the distance is short. Finally, we have to build lots of nuclear power plants. This power plant produce lots of electricity with leaking small CO2. However, we should try to do the first way.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daniel! Your work is amazing! You researched your answer. I learned a lot from your homework. Superb! However, take note of the corrections to improve more,

- Teacher Debbie

I do a lot of things that can affect to global warming. 
>> I do a lot of things that contribute to global warming.

When I ride a car, then 59 gram of CO2 leak for 1 km. 
>> When I ride a car, 59 grams of CO2 leaks every kilometer.

And when I use air conditional in summer, then 258 gram of CO2 leak for hour. 
>> Moreover, when I use the air conditioner in summer, 258 grams of CO2 leak every hour.

Aside from these, I used appliances and transportation and leak lots of CO2 a day.
>> Aside from these,  I used appliances and transportation which give off a lot of CO2 a day.

Think that about 7500000000 people live like it.
>> Imagine about 7,500,000,000 people living like this.

There will be too much CO2 in this world! 
>> This is a good sentence.

In addition, there are lots of factories that leak CO2.
>> This is a good sentence.

In the case of a steam power plant, 991 gram of CO2 to produce 1 kWh. 
>> In the case of a steam power plant, 991 grams of CO2 produce 1 kWh. 

Then how can we try not to leak CO2 as possible as small? 
>> Then how can we prevent CO2 leakage?

The way is simple. 
>> It is simple.

It's just reducing the frequency of using car and appliances which are not vital.
>> It's just reducing the frequency of using cars and appliances, which are not vital.

We should use nature.
>> We should make use of nature.

 For example, we can use the cool air in the mountain or wind instead of air conditional. 
>> For example, we can make use of a mountain's cool air or wind instead of air conditioners.

And we can ride bike or running instead of car if the distance is short. 
>> In addition, we can ride bikes or run instead of using cars if the distance is short.

Finally, we have to build lots of nuclear power plants. 
>> This is a good sentence.

This power plant produce lots of electricity with leaking small CO2. 
>> This power plant produces lots of electricity but leaks little CO2. 

However, we should try to do the first way.
>> However, we should try to reduce car and appliance usage first.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114690 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 1
114689 diet ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 633
114688 What is your most valued possession? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 2
114687 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 521
114686 Is there a place that you will never visit? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-14 2
114685 wow!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 518
114684 I don\'t want to be comedian ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 564
114683 good habit for our childrens ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 461
114682 my lucky charm? ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 403
114681 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 640
114680 Stent Operation ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 494
114679 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 402
114678 HOMEWORK °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 1
114677 What¡¯s wrong with believing everything you¡¯re hearing? ÀÓ*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 338
114676 Do you think birthdays are important? Why or why not? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 566
114675 The most liked ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 0
114674 Are you good at coping with stress? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 3
114673 My goals\' review related to my work.\\ ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 1
114672 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 0
114671 Some people think that schools should select students according... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-13 500

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04