¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

LIving WIth Someone

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿ì
2022-02-04 922

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think living with someone is better than living alone. It can be more fun living with someon than living alone, because we can play, talk together, spend our time together when we live with someone. However it can be very boring when we live alone. Also we can easily be depressed when we live alone.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Alex:)

That's true. It's more comforting to live with another person. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I think living with someone is better than living alone. 
>> CORRECT

It can be more fun living with someon than living alone, because we can play, talk together, spend our time together when we live with someone.
>> It can be more fun living with someone than living alone because we can play, talk together and spend our time together.

 However it can be very boring when we live alone. 
>> On the other hand, it can be very boring when we live alone. 

Also we can easily be depressed when we live alone.
>> Also, we can easily be depressed when we live alone. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115732 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1370
115731 Essay (Jan 19th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 846
115730 Would you ever consider going skydiving? Why or why not? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1075
115729 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 598
115728 If life is a highway, what mode of transportation are you using? ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1252
115727 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 2
115726 Nowadays, a lot of offices employ open-space designs instead of... ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 516
115725 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 344
115724 Do you think that having a lot of money can make you happy? Why... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 734
115723 Do you think that having a lot of money can make you happy? Why... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 0
115722 In many cultures, women cook more often than men. Why is this? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 517
115721 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 336
115720 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 350
115719 What does a holiday mean to you? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 537
115718 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1
115717 Homework. ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 0
115716 Can goals help to change your life? How? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 445
115715 you can¡¯t buy happiness\". If you were richer, do you think you... º¯*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 338
115714 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1
115713 Homework (1/18) ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04