¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think should be done to improve living conditions in your city?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-02-05 1082

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think there needs to be a place to take a rest in order to improve in my city. For example a city forest with nature. And there should be a place to enjoy cultural life. Lastly, It's important to get along well with your neighbors. :)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Elic:)

That's true. There should be a place for people to unwind in. Living in a city can be very hectic so having a place to relax in would be perfect. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I think there needs to be a place to take a rest in order to improve in my city. 
>> I think there needs to be a place where we can take a rest to improve my city. 

For example a city forest with nature. 
>> For example, there should be a forest in a city so we can see nature. 

And there should be a place to enjoy cultural life. 
>> There should also be a place where  we can enjoy our culture. 

Lastly, It's important to get along well with your neighbors. :)
>> Lastly, it's important to get along well with your neighbors. :)

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116968 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 995
116967 What are good study habits? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 1353
116966 If you were a song, what song would you be and why? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 952
116965 Where is the United States of America? / Why do you want to... ÁÖ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 707
116964 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 0
116963 Find the adjectives in the sentences. Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 955
116962 lesson 8 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 1136
116961 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 890
116960 Writing Task (Mar 1th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 1028
116959 South Korea is about to approve vaccinating children ages 5-11.... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 1107
116958 Why didn\'t I do the right thing? ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 667
116957 Just Start ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 824
116956 Home work ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 1201
116955 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 1060
116954 What genre of movies is the best for you? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 756
116953 Re:Turn - Ash Wednesday Sermon 3 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 1290
116952 Re:Turn - Ash Wednesday Sermon 2 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 772
116951 Re:Turn - Ash Wednesday Sermon 1 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 737
116950 Vaccinate ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 821
116949 Do you think it is acceptable to test cosmetics on animals? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-02 735

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04