¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think should be done to improve living conditions in your city?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-02-07 519

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, we should be more polite to one another, then, the city will be more peaceful.
A few days ago, one person killed other person only because of bumping into each other's shoulders.
This terrible thing happened because of their less polite.
And I think Koreans are not that polite to one another.
So I think we should be more polite to one another.
Of course our living conditions are important, but I think these kinds of problems are more important.
If we think one another more than before, we might be able to change this world more peaceful.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:)

I was shocked with what you said. Some people have very short tempers. I hope this won't happen again. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

In my opinion, we should be more polite to one another, then, the city will be more peaceful.
>> In my opinion, we should be more polite to one another, the the city will be more peaceful.

A few days ago, one person killed other person only because of bumping into each other's shoulders.
>> A few days ago, one person killed another person only because of bumping into each other's shoulders.

This terrible thing happened because of their less polite.
>> This terrible thing happened because of their impolite attitudes. 

And I think Koreans are not that polite to one another.
>> CORRECT

So I think we should be more polite to one another.
>> CORRECT

Of course our living conditions are important, but I think these kinds of problems are more important.
>> CORRECT

If we think one another more than before, we might be able to change this world more peaceful.
>> If we consider each other more that before, we we might make this world more peaceful. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118273 What stressful situation did you have in your new company? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 4
118272 Writing Task(Apr 13th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-16 560
118271 What do you think of people who complain a lot? ½Å*¼· ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 597
118270 Is setting a deadline important? why do you say so? ½Å*¼· ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 543
118269 I don\\\'t want to be in a rush. ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 756
118268 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 1
118267 According to the article, with the opening of the Seoul Arena,... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 545
118266 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 674
118265 4/14 HOMEWORK ( •̀ ¥ø •́ )y ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 738
118264 What I should do every day but don¡¯t. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 722
118263 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 2
118262 What is the best thing about your birthplace? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 869
118261 What is your greatest childhood memory? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 678
118260 What is something you should do every day but don\'t? And why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 573
118259 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 503
118258 Listen and Take Notes Discussion °­*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 611
118257 It is valued to spend time together. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 0
118256 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 0
118255 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 1
118254 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 531

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04