¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

online

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2022-02-08 744

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We are using online apps in many parts of our lives.
Sometimes I am very afraid so many apps because online is an anonymous space.
Online apps are convenient and save time specially to young people.
But it is true that it is very shocking to old people such as this changing.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Ms. Lily! 
Change is inevitable. Should we resist or accept? Thank you for sharing your thoughts. have a great day
Aki~

We are using online apps in many parts of our lives.
>>> Correct!
OR >>> The use of different apps are already part of or lives.
Sometimes I am very afraid so many apps because online is an anonymous space.
>>> Sometimes, I am very afraid with so many apps because online is an anonymous space.
Online apps are convenient and save time specially to young people.
>>> Online apps are convenient and save time especially to young people
But it is true that it is very shocking to old people such as this changing.
>>> In fact, this is very shocking to the old generation because of the changes brought by these apps.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115939 resume_ request to review È«*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 7
115938 It is easy to be worse the global warming, but it\'s hard to... ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 527
115937 What do you use to help you plan? A smartphone application?... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 363
115936 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 866
115935 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 1484
115934 What do people do on the street that annoys you? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 169
115933 look for ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 1
115932 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 380
115931 My first vocal teacher:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 703
115930 What would you do if you had to travel to a country where its... ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 404
115929 What is your favorite exercise and why? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 421
115928 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 693
115927 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 329
115926 Do you think it is best to argue or just walk away? À±*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 1
115925 Who is the teacher that inspired you the most and what is the... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 424
115924 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 1
115923 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 464
115922 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 1004
115921 Old People and Young People ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 1771
115920 Is there any kind of meat you would not eat? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-26 588

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04