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What is the worst news you\'ve ever heard in South Korea? Explain in detail.

작성자: 류*주
2022-02-10 815

회원님의 영작문

In my opinion, the worst news I've ever heard in South Korea is about Ferry Sewol.
Ferry Sewol is a big cruise ship which is made in Korea, and about 7 years ago, it sunk in the middle of the ocean.
Ferry Sewol was going to an island and there were hundreds of high school students.
They were going to the island as a trip, and there were also many teachers.
When Ferry Sewol began to sink, the captain didn't do anything, and he just told to people, "just stay in the ship.".
But Ferry Sewol sunk, and the captain escaped the ship alone.
Almost students died, and also many teachers died.
Some people tried to save the students, but they died as well.
And this event is very famous that I heard the news when I was in Philippines.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi John:)

That's true! Many people were devastated by that news, even me. I hope it won't happen again. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

In my opinion, the worst news I've ever heard in South Korea is about Ferry Sewol.
>> In my opinion, the worst news I've ever heard in South Korea is about Sewol Ferry incident. 

Ferry Sewol is a big cruise ship which is made in Korea, and about 7 years ago, it sunk in the middle of the ocean.
>> The Sewol ferry is a big cruise ship, which is made in South Korea about 7 years ago, sunk in the middle of the ocean. 

Ferry Sewol was going to an island and there were hundreds of high school students.
>> The ferry was about to go to an island, which had hundreds of high school students. 

They were going to the island as a trip, and there were also many teachers.
>> They were going to the island as a trip and there were also many teachers. 

When Ferry Sewol began to sink, the captain didn't do anything, and he just told to people, "just stay in the ship.".
>> When it began to sink, the captain didn't do anything and told the people to just stay on the ship. 

But Ferry Sewol sunk, and the captain escaped the ship alone.
>> The ferry sunk and the captain escaped the ship alone. 

Almost students died, and also many teachers died.
>> Most of the people and teachers died. 

Some people tried to save the students, but they died as well.
>> CORRECT

And this event is very famous that I heard the news when I was in Philippines.
>> And this incident became well known even when I was in the Philippines. 

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