¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Voice, music

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2022-02-14 787

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My voice:) I love my voice.
Sing is my life and music is root of my heart.
If my voice change other voice, maybe I don't want to keep living.
Music is my everything and I relized I really really love music, singing and my voice

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:)

Wow, that was very poetic. You indeed have a very beautiful voice based on all the videos that I have watched. Keep it up!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

My voice:) I love my voice.
> The thing that I love the most is my voice. 

Sing is my life and music is root of my heart.
>> Singing is my life and music is the root of my heart. 

If my voice change other voice, maybe I don't want to keep living.
>> If my voice change to another voice, maybe I don't want to keep living.

Music is my everything and I relized I really really love music, singing and my voice
>>Music is my everything and I realized that I really love music and singing. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114958 I don\'t want to be famous ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 390
114957 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 941
114956 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1264
114955 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 409
114954 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 2
114953 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 394
114952 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 272
114951 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114950 Homework ÀÌ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 2
114949 Transportation ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 435
114948 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 490
114947 Do you like trying new reataurants, or do you prefer to go to... ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 735
114946 Household Chores Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 426
114945 What do you think will happen if North Korea and South Korea are... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 539
114944 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 463
114943 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114942 Why do you think eating fish is good for you? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114941 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1
114940 What worry do you have nowadays? What good advice can you give... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 382
114939 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 393

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04