¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ø
2022-02-19 606

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What do you think is the best invention ever and why?

I think smartphone is the best invention until now. Because we can use the function of map, telephone, computer, mp3 and camera etc.
Before the smartphone was invented, we had to use these functions by each devices. But as soon as the smartphone was launched, we
didn't have to carry a lot of devices. We just need to carry a small device that we can hold by a hand.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Won :)

Smartphones really are the best inventions. They are very useful for our society nowadays. :)

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I think smartphone is the best invention until now. Because we can use the function of map, telephone, computer, mp3 and camera etc.
>> I think smartphones are the best inventions until now because we can use the functions such as maps, dial pad, computer, mp3, camera etc. 

Before the smartphone was invented, we had to use these functions by each devices. 
>> Before smartphones were invented, we had to use these functions by individual devices. 

But as soon as the smartphone was launched, we didn't have to carry a lot of devices. 
>> But as soon as the smartphones were launched, we didn't have to carry a lot of devices. 

We just need to carry a small device that we can hold by a hand.
>>We just need to carry a small device that we can hold by hand.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114994 Do you prefer summer vacation or winter vacations? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 2
114993 What does being rejected feels like? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 0
114992 When was the happiest day of your life and why was it very happy? ¼º*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 335
114991 What advice would you like to give to your old self and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 1
114990 What is the best memory you have in school? Explain in detail. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-24 1
114989 For having a good sleep ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114988 What advice would you like to give to your old self and why? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1752
114987 We should fix our personalities ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 777
114986 In your country, is it important to consider the age and... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 4
114985 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1386
114984 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 400
114983 My dream car ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1
114982 homework (¼÷Á¦) ÃÖ*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 7798
114981 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 456
114980 homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1010
114979 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 2
114978 What is the best memory you have in school? Explain in detail. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 731
114977 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 575
114976 What types of diets have you heard of? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 604
114975 How is the law enforcement in your city? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 626

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04