무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How is beauty defined in your culture?

작성자: 김*경
2022-02-21 614

회원님의 영작문

Nowadays Korean beauty standards prioritize a slim figure, small face, v-shaped jaw, pale skin, straight eyebrows, larger eyes. Beauty standards for the eyes include aegyo-sal, which is a term used in Korea referring to the small fatty deposits underneath the eyes that are said to give a person a more youthful appearance.
And many Korean girls get double eyelid surgery after Korean SAT as a gift for their hardworking for a long time because double eyelid makes their eyes look larger. These Korean beauty standards have been influenced largely by celebrities including actresses and K-pop stars. The physical appearance of K-pop idols has greatly impacted the beauty standards among young Koreans.

However, I doubt it is a true Korean beauty standard that contemporary Koreans agree with. I suspect it is the beauty standard that Korean youngsters are forced to follow by mass media or big capitalists. I want to define Korean beauty in an inner aspect rather than an outer appearance.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Steve! Thank you so much for taking the time to do your homework. However, when you're going to use the exact words from any source, surround them with quotation marks. 

- Debbie


Nowadays Korean beauty standards prioritize a slim figure, small face, v-shaped jaw, pale skin, straight eyebrows, larger eyes. 
>> Nowadays, Korean beauty standards prioritize a slim figure, small face, v-shaped jaw, pale skin, straight eyebrows, and larger eyes. 

Beauty standards for the eyes include aegyo-sal, which is a term used in Korea referring to the small fatty deposits underneath the eyes that are said to give a person a more youthful appearance.
>> Beauty standards for eyes include "aegyo-sal," a term used in Korea referring to the small fatty deposits underneath the eyes that give a person a more youthful appearance.

And many Korean girls get double eyelid surgery after Korean SAT as a gift for their hardworking for a long time because double eyelid makes their eyes look larger. 
>> Moreover, many Korean girls get double eyelid surgery after Korean SAT as a gift for their hard work. Double eyelids make their eyes look larger. 

These Korean beauty standards have been influenced largely by celebrities including actresses and K-pop stars. 
>> These Korean beauty standards have been influenced largely by celebrities, including actresses and K-pop stars. 

The physical appearance of K-pop idols has greatly impacted the beauty standards among young Koreans.
>> This is a good sentence.

However, I doubt it is a true Korean beauty standard that contemporary Koreans agree with. 
>> However, I doubt it is the real Korean beauty standard that contemporary Koreans agree with. 

I suspect it is the beauty standard that Korean youngsters are forced to follow by mass media or big capitalists. 
>> I suspect it is the beauty standard that mass media and big capitalists enforce on Korean youngsters.

I want to define Korean beauty in an inner aspect rather than an outer appearance.
>> I want to define Korean beauty in terms of character rather than outer appearance.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
116543 Chemical firms on high alert for toughened safety law 유*진 완료 2022-02-17 1
116542 HOMEWORK 배*호 완료 2022-02-17 392
116541 89-year-old graduates college with highest honors 유*진 완료 2022-02-17 1
116540 I think I\'m going to work 이*은 완료 2022-02-17 461
116539 Stocks:) 이*은 완료 2022-02-17 415
116538 use of the phone 이*하 완료 2022-02-17 597
116537 Do you think marriage is important? Why or why not? 황*별 완료 2022-02-17 269
116536 Do you exercise? 김*규 완료 2022-02-17 3
116535 homework 김*연 완료 2022-02-17 205
116534 What do you think about voting? Is it a good way to make... 태*서 완료 2022-02-17 555
116533 Does your family have a movie night? Tell me about it. 엄*주 완료 2022-02-17 485
116532 29.30.31 김*현 완료 2022-02-17 485
116531 Homework 함*주 완료 2022-02-17 1
116530 When I got a job, I moved out of my parents\' house. 김*태 완료 2022-02-17 1
116529 Is giving a good first impression important? 김*태 완료 2022-02-17 1
116528 homework 김*우 완료 2022-02-17 276
116527 How do you feel and what do you do after a long vacation?... 여*진 완료 2022-02-17 0
116526 How do you feel and what do you do after a long vacation?... 류*주 완료 2022-02-17 274
116525 Homework 권*미 완료 2022-02-17 1
116524 Thursday homework 류*우 완료 2022-02-17 249

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04