¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My exercise

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*³ª
2022-02-22 880

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I like exercise. My favorite exercise is walking while listening to music. When I am walking while listening to music, It made me comfortable and have confident. and running too. If i run while listening to music, my stress will go away.
And my second favorite exercise is jump rope. Jump rope makes to lose weights but it is really hard and takes a lot of energy.
I prefer jump rope for losing weights.
Third is skating(on the ground). Skating makes me refreshing. and it's fast. It makes me happy. but be careful because it can bump into people, and if I fell down, i will get seriously hurt, so i have to wear a helmet.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë


Hi Hanna,
We need to exercise because exercise helps people lose weight and lower the risk of some diseases. Exercising regularly lowers a person's risk of developing some diseases, including obesity, type 2 diabetes, and high blood pressure. Exercise also can help keep your body at a healthy weight. Exercise can help a person age well. ~ Teacher QUENNY
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like exercise. 
>>I like to exercise. 
My favorite exercise is walking while listening to music. 
>> My favorite exercise is walking while listening to music. 
When I am walking while listening to music, It made me comfortable and have confident. and running too. 
>>  When I am walking while listening to music, It makes me comfortable, gives me confidence, and runs too. 
If i run while listening to music, my stress will go away.
>> Running while listening to music release my stress. 
And my second favorite exercise is jump rope. 
>> And my second favorite exercise is the jump rope. 
Jump rope makes to lose weights but it is really hard and takes a lot of energy.
>> Jump rope loses weight but it is really hard because it takes a lot of energy.
I prefer jump rope for losing weights.
>> I prefer to do jump rope for losing weight.
Third is skating(on the ground). 
>> The third is skating on the ground. 
Skating makes me refreshing. and it's fast. 
>> Skating refreshes me and it's fast. 
It makes me happy. but be careful because it can bump into people, and if I fell down, i will get seriously hurt, so i have to wear a helmet.
>> Skating makes me happy but I need to be very careful because I might bump other people and if I fall down, I will get seriously hurt, so I have to wear a helmet and some protective gear. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I like exercise. My favorite exercise is walking while listening to music. When I am walking while listening to music, It made me comfortable and have confident. and running too. If i run while listening to music, my stress will go away.
And my second favorite exercise is jump rope. Jump rope makes to lose weights but it is really hard and takes a lot of energy.
I prefer jump rope for losing weights.
Third is skating(on the ground). Skating makes me refreshing. and it's fast. It makes me happy. but be careful because it can bump into people, and if I fell down, i will get seriously hurt, so i have to wear a helmet.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117965 HOMEWORK: ¹®*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 438
117964 Are you afraid of getting old? Why or why not? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 390
117963 Are you afraid of getting old? Why or why not? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 0
117962 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 347
117961 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 345
117960 Hello kate, ÀÌ*µ¿ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 2
117959 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 1
117958 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 3
117957 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 1
117956 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 863
117955 violence ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 596
117954 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 427
117953 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 797
117952 HOMEWORK: ¹®*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 472
117951 Have you ever done a small crime before? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 6
117950 Do you think history repeats itself? Explain your answer. ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 513
117949 Describe a time when you told your friend an important truth. ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-03 680
117948 Is Will Smith¡¯s act justifiable? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-03 1
117947 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-03 528
117946 What are your favorite cultural heritages so far? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-03 633

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04