¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Feb 27th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-03-01 935

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Bungee jumping?>>
I do hate bungee jumping.
I loved to ride the rides at the amusement park.
I wrote in past tense ¡°LOVED¡±
15 years ago, when I was riding a Viking ride. I remember the moment vividly. When the Viking started going up, swinging back and forth, for the first twenty, thirty second I enjoyed it very much. But I suddenly felt a great pain in my chest and could hardly breath. And my eye sight went slowly and I passe out since. When I opened my eyes, I noticed my friends who I went with were all beside me, some talking to the operator of the ride and some making phone calls to 119. But a few minutes later, I passe out again. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself on the bed transported by an ambulance. I was diagnosed with cardiac arrhythmia. The doctor asked me to ride the Viking ride again with an equipment on my chest so that it could record every symptom of my heart during riding and he could analyse the reaction of my heart with the data. I replied ¡°Are you insane?¡±

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, U Seung!

Wow! That's totally an insane thing to ask a weird question from a doctor. I guess, I understand why wouldn't try it. It's really not safe for you to try extreme sports activities due to your condition. Just make sure to keep yourself safe and healthy all the time. Let go of all your worries because it's also not good for your health. Just enjoy life and what it gives you.

Thank you for sharing and have a nice day! 

~T. Roanne ^_^
===============================================
I do hate bungee jumping.
>> Correct! 
I loved to ride the rides at the amusement park.
>> Correct! 
I wrote in past tense ¡°LOVED¡±
>> Correct! 
15 years ago, when I was riding a Viking ride. I remember the moment vividly. 
>> Correct! 
When the Viking started going up, swinging back and forth, for the first twenty, thirty second I enjoyed it very much. 
>> Correct! 
But I suddenly felt a great pain in my chest and could hardly breath. 
>> Correct! 
And my eye sight went slowly and I passe out since. 
>> And my eyesight went slowly and I have passed out from. 
When I opened my eyes, I noticed my friends who I went with were all beside me, some talking to the operator of the ride and some making phone calls to 119. 
>> Correct! 
But a few minutes later, I passe out again. 
>> But a few minutes later, I passed out again. 
When I opened my eyes again, I found myself on the bed transported by an ambulance. 
>> Correct! 
I was diagnosed with cardiac arrhythmia. 
>> Correct! 
The doctor asked me to ride the Viking ride again with an equipment on my chest so that it could record every symptom of my heart during riding and he could analyse the reaction of my heart with the data. 
>> The doctor asked me to ride the Viking ride again with an equipment on my chest so that it could record every symptom of my heart during riding and he could analyze the reaction of my heart with the data. 
I replied ¡°Are you insane?¡±
>> Correct! 



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116424 Do you know of any supersttions connected to weddings? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 3
116423 HOMEWORK: When and how do you check on someone¡¯s... ¼­*¾È ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 461
116422 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 1
116421 Would you like to eat out every day? Would this be healthy? ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 390
116420 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 1
116419 , ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 3
116418 What kind of challenge would you like to try? ¾ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 2
116417 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 1
116416 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 414
116415 Hug:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 343
116414 homework.5 ¾ç*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 441
116413 Q. Do you like meeting new people? Á¤*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 470
116412 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 779
116411 What is that one thing that you will not change about yourself... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 468
116410 What is the best and worst thing about traveling to a new... À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 3
116409 What is one unique way we can show our love to other people? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-02-15 788
116408 2/14 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 736
116407 Homework ¼Õ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 530
116406 homework(3) Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 342
116405 homework ¹Ú*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-02-14 485

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04