¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

New city

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*³ª
2022-03-03 530

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I moved new my home in Gamil
Gamil is in Hanam, Hanam is in Gyeongido
My new home is an apartment.
This place is so good, because Gamil has a big mountain, and many trees.
but here has disadvantages.
Gamil has many bugs, beacause of a big mountain and many trees.
so I hard to be comfortable in summer
and one another is transportation
This place is no subway, Only have 5 buses
so, when I should go to somewhere, it always took more 30 minutes by bus.
I want to develop transportation before I become an adult.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Hana,
In the city life, there are the most luxuries and comfortable amenities and city of the people enjoys much by this facilities. In a city, many of the people live with very comfort for its cultural, economic, and commercial facilities. City life lures to the people for migrating from rural to urban life. A city needs to be a sustainable, livable environment to be a good city to live in. And great places are designed for people, taking into account all their human needs. That means they have fresh air, a lack of noise and trash, and plenty of shade, if necessary. ~ Teacher QUENNY.. Have a great weekend..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I moved new my home in Gamil
>> I moved to my new home in Gamil. 
Gamil is in Hanam, Hanam is in Gyeongido
>> Gamil is in Hanam, Hanam is in Gyeongido City. 
My new home is an apartment.
>> My new home is an apartment.
This place is so good, because Gamil has a big mountain, and many trees.
>> This place is so good and a nice place to live in because Gamil has big mountains and is surrounded by many trees too. 
but here has disadvantages.
>> But it has disadvantages.
Gamil has many bugs, beacause of a big mountain and many trees. so I hard to be comfortable in summer and one another is transportation
>> Gamil has many bugs, because of the big mountains and many trees so it's hard to feel comfortable in summer and ride on one another transportation. 
This place is no subway, Only have 5 buses so, when I should go to somewhere, it always took more 30 minutes by bus.
>> This place has no subway and it only has 5 buses so when I want to go somewhere it always took more than 30 minutes by bus.
I want to develop transportation before I become an adult.
>>  I want to develop the transportation system in our place before I become an adult.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I moved new my home in Gamil
Gamil is in Hanam, Hanam is in Gyeongido
My new home is an apartment.
This place is so good, because Gamil has a big mountain, and many trees.
but here has disadvantages.
Gamil has many bugs, beacause of a big mountain and many trees.
so I hard to be comfortable in summer
and one another is transportation
This place is no subway, Only have 5 buses
so, when I should go to somewhere, it always took more 30 minutes by bus.
I want to develop transportation before I become an adult.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115751 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 1207
115750 > What cartoon shows are popular in your country? ÇÑ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 557
115749 Some people say that it is possible to tell a lot about a... ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 997
115748 What other things do you need for you to study English? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 969
115747 Do you think that having a lot of money can make you happy? Why... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 1438
115746 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 1
115745 How does this pandemic change your birthday celebration? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 1
115744 Is there a kind of drama that you will never watch? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 2
115743 What made Barbara sick, if she just went to a birthday party? ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-20 1281
115742 I\'m doing my homework...^^ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1
115741 What critical feedback do you most often receive? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 955
115740  What do you think is the worst thing about being in the... º¯*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 886
115739 What do you think of renting clothes and toys? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 866
115738 What do you think of renting clothes? ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1215
115737 Why are examinations important? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 5
115736 I want to know how they can guess where heritage is ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 644
115735 Can music influence your behavior? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 870
115734 If a book has been made into a movie, which do you prefer to do... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 768
115733 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1026
115732 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-19 1502

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04