¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Just with my friends:)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2022-03-09 1162

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First, I'm going to invite my best friends.
And I don't want to big party, I want just small scale party with my best friend.
Because it's fun when I with my friends every time I happy and laugh.
That it's my party.
Big music, drinking alcohol, meeting new friends it's too good but not my type.
If I can prepare my self party, I'm just hang out with my friends haha:)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann!
 
That's true. We don't need a lot of money to have a good time, right? It's just a matter of being with great people. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

First, I'm going to invite my best friends.
>> CORRECT

And I don't want to big party, I want just small scale party with my best friend.
>> And I don't want to have big party. I just want a small scale party with my best friends. 

Because it's fun when I with my friends every time I happy and laugh.
>> It is because it's fun. My friends make me happy and laugh. 

That it's my party.
>> That's how I will have my party. 

Big music, drinking alcohol, meeting new friends it's too good but not my type.
>> Listening to loud music, drinking alcohol, and meeting new friends can be good but not my type. 

If I can prepare my self party, I'm just hang out with my friends haha:)
>> If I can prepare my self a party, I'll just choose to hang out with my friends. Hahaha! :) 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118870 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-10 1
118869 Which State in America do you really like to live in, and why? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-10 1
118868 If you can have a part-time job, what do you like it to be? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-10 2
118867 my busiest day of week ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-05-10 495
118866 Should poor people be punished for stealing if they are stealing... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-10 663
118865 What is your all-time favorite movie? Why? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-10 726
118864 Writing Task(May 9th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 688
118863 5/9 HOMEWORK [{(IT\'S)ZOE\'S}ONE] ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 494
118862 Information À±*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 594
118861 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 0
118860 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 708
118859 Choice of the fast food ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 803
118858 What is the most famous female sport in your country? Why? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 933
118857 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 2
118856 Allowance ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 1
118855 What is the most positive change you have experienced in your... ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 642
118854 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 494
118853 My family. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 780
118852 Would you rather have the perfect body or be super intelligent? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 627
118851 What are the things that usually annoy you? Explain your answer. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-09 603

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04