¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

what kinds of social activities do you do in church?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-03-09 440

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have three social activities in the church.
First, One of the departments that I belong to is the English worship department where I work as a department accountant. Speaking of the English worship, it is the worship where foreigners feel free to attend. We have a foreign pastor. Now we have four foreign graduate students attending English worship every Sunday.
Second, I am also a Sunday School teacher to help Korean children do English worship. Our Sunday school has tried to have more children attend the English service and recruit more teachers to help them. So I got to participate in it this time.
Third, I also begin to be an AWANA teacher in March. AWANA is derived from the letters of "Approved Workmen Are Not Ashamed" as taken from 2 Timothy. Awana is an international evangelical Christian nonprofit organization in child and youth discipleship. We are are teaching the Bible and sometimes are discussing what they read with students. It's interesting, but so demanding job.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Steve!

Thank you for sharing about your role in the church! I am amazed by your churches' concern for kids. I also agree about the work being so hard! I also feel the same, but I think it will be definitely worth it. :)

For today's corrections, nothing much! Just some typographical errors and I gave some suggestions. Your answers are always well said, so I look forward to the next one.

Great job!
-Teacher Violet

I have three social activities in the church.

>> CORRECT!

First, One of the departments that I belong to is the English worship department where I work as a department accountant. 

>> First, one of the departments that I belong to is the English worship department where I work as a department accountant.  (capitalization) 


Speaking of the English worship, it is the worship where foreigners feel free to attend. 

>> CORRECT!

We have a foreign pastor. 

>> CORRECT!

Now we have four foreign graduate students attending English worship every Sunday.

>> CORRECT!

Second, I am also a Sunday School teacher to help Korean children do English worship. 

>> CORRECT!

Our Sunday school has tried to have more children attend the English service and recruit more teachers to help them. 

>> CORRECT!

So I got to participate in it this time.

>> CORRECT!

Third, I also begin to be an AWANA teacher in March. 

>> Third, I also began to be an AWANA teacher in March.


AWANA is derived from the letters of "Approved Workmen Are Not Ashamed" as taken from 2 Timothy. 

>> CORRECT!
OR >> AWANA is an acronym for "Approved Workmen Are Not Ashamed" as taken from 2nd Timothy. 

Awana is an international evangelical Christian nonprofit organization in child and youth discipleship.

>> CORRECT!

We are are teaching the Bible and sometimes are discussing what they read with students. 

>> We are are teaching the Bible and sometimes are discussing what they read with students. 


It's interesting, but so demanding job.

>> It's an interesting but very demanding job.

OR >> It's interesting, but is also a very demanding job.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116888 The most expensive ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 2
116887 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 0
116886 Ryu Hyun Jin ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 411
116885 HOMEWORK: What¡¯s good or bad about having packed lunches? ¼­*¾È ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 683
116884 Homework. ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 744
116883 What are two foods that you\'re craving to eat right now? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 848
116882 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 2
116881 What is the hardest part of learning English? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 922
116880 lesson 8 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 577
116879 homework ¾ç*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 1034
116878 Seoul vows to become digital emotional culture city À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 1
116877 What is your favorite holiday? ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 1
116876 Which famous celebrity influenced you the most and why? º¯*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 764
116875 . ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 815
116874 homework ¹Ú*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 721
116873 homework ¹Ú*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 605
116872 How do celebrate children\'s day when you were young? Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-28 806
116871 Homework °í*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-27 671
116870 Have you ever gotten lost while traveling, if so, tell about it? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-27 2
116869 What kind of questions would you like to ask your interviewers?... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-27 1105

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04