무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How can political campaigns be better organized?

작성자: 김*경
2022-03-15 1070

회원님의 영작문

I think there are three ways to be better organized political campaigns.
First, political campaigns should be controlled by a control tower not to confuse voters. As the saying goes, too many cooks spoil the broth.
Second, the main idea of campaigns should be repeated frequently to create a lasting impression on the voters. Therefore, the opposition party will try to get the candidate off message by bringing up policy or personal questions that are not related to the talking points. For example, in the 2008 American presidential election McCain originally used a message that focused on his patriotism: "Country First", later the message changed. However, Obama ran on a consistent, simple message of "Change" throughout his campaign, he became the first black president.
Third, the message should be broad enough to attract the most potential voters. A narrow message can't get support from various supporters. It only alienates voters or slows the candidate down.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there Steve!

Thank you again for answering my homework! The ideas you presented here were all valid and were actually impressive as always. We already discussed this in earlier classes but this time, you added an emphasis on maintaining a main concept or message. I liked that one in particular because a good politician must stand by their words and be consistent with their ideals.

Anyway, for the corrections, just be mindful of some word choices, some words are more appropriate than others. If you noticed your corrections kept decreasing so I hope you can see the improvement and aim to perfect your writing skills one of these days!

Keep it up and have a good night!
-Teacher Violet.

     I think there are three ways to be better organized political campaigns.
>> I think there are three ways to have better organized political campaigns.

First, political campaigns should be controlled by a control tower not to confuse voters. 
>> CORRECT!

As the saying goes, too many cooks spoil the broth.
>> CORRECT!

Second, the main idea of campaigns should be repeated frequently to create a lasting impression on the voters.
>> CORRECT!

Therefore, the opposition party will try to get the candidate off message by bringing up policy or personal questions that are not related to the talking points. 
>> CORRECT!

For example, in the 2008 American presidential election McCain originally used a message that focused on his patriotism: "Country First", later the message changed. 
>> CORRECT!

     However, Obama ran on a consistent, simple message of "Change" throughout his campaign, he became the first black president.
>> However, Obama ran on a consistent, simple message of "Change" throughout his campaign, and he became the first black president.

Third, the message should be broad enough to attract the most potential voters. 
>> CORRECT!

A narrow message can't get support from various supporters. 
>> CORRECT!

It only alienates voters or slows the candidate down.
>> CORRECT!

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
116221 What is your greatest achievement as a student and why? 류*주 완료 2022-02-09 442
116220 If you can move to another country, which one would you pick and... 여*진 완료 2022-02-09 0
116219 What is the best lesson you have learned from one of your... 여*진 완료 2022-02-09 0
116218 What are you looking forward to this 2022 and why? 여*진 완료 2022-02-09 0
116217 Home work 김*주 완료 2022-02-09 623
116216 Homework 기*현 완료 2022-02-09 1150
116215 Can you forgive your friends easily when they did something bad... 이*연 완료 2022-02-09 670
116214 Shorter Impatient 김*영 완료 2022-02-09 899
116213 Homework 김*혁 완료 2022-02-09 726
116212 Wednesday homework 류*우 완료 2022-02-09 523
116211 Homework 함*주 완료 2022-02-09 1
116210 measures to protect and improve the mental health of children... 호*윤 완료 2022-02-09 1
116209 What was the most important thing your parents taught you? 김*은 완료 2022-02-09 2
116208 Being Kind 최*우 완료 2022-02-09 592
116207 What are the things you consider important in life? 양*희 완료 2022-02-09 3
116206 Homework 임*숙 완료 2022-02-09 682
116205 Homework 이*빈 완료 2022-02-09 880
116204 Is there a song that makes you emotional? Which song is it and... 이*영 완료 2022-02-09 3
116203 Over 3 in 10 out-of-school children at risk of suicide : survey 유*진 완료 2022-02-09 1
116202 Robot chefs unviled at boot camp to cut troops workloads,... 유*진 완료 2022-02-09 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]