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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Are there any iconic locations, such as the Taj Mahal or the Statue of Liberty, that you would love

작성자: 김*경
2022-03-15 744

회원님의 영작문

One of my favorite movies is "the Sound of Music". As long as I know, the scenes were filmed in Salzburg, Austria. I would love to fly to every location where the movie was filmed.
I love the hill where Julie Andrews taught Captain von Trapp's children how to sing to welcome their father and uncle.
I love the dancing hall where von Trapp's children said goodbye to all guests with singing and dancing.
I love the dining room where Julie Andrews made all children cry with heartwarming words.
I love the bedroom where all children got together and sing together to shake off their fears of thunder. I learned how to treat frightened children from Julie Andrews comforting them with encouragement.
I love the balcony where Christopher Plummer confessed his love for Julie Andrews bravely in front of Eleanor Parker. More scenes blew my mind.
I got a chance to come near the hill where Julie Andrews sang with children. However, I was on a business trip. I couldn't make time to go there.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Wow, Steve!

Thank you for this entry! It was incredibly detailed and I was carried by the emotions you described. That opportunity was amazing so it must be so frustrating when you weren't able to spend time visiting the areas you yearn to visit. Even I felt the frustration! Thank you again for sharing about it. 

For today's corrections, please note the capitalization of every word in the title. There were also very simple corrections on proper word choice and don't forget to add "the" or articles in general.

Great work!
-Teacher Violet.

One of my favorite movies is "the Sound of Music". 

>> One of my favorite movies is "The Sound of Music".


As long as I know, the scenes were filmed in Salzburg, Austria. 

>> As far as I know, the scenes were filmed in Salzburg, Austria. 


I would love to fly to every location where the movie was filmed.
>> CORRECT!

I love the hill where Julie Andrews taught Captain von Trapp's children how to sing to welcome their father and uncle.
>> CORRECT!

I love the dancing hall where von Trapp's children said goodbye to all guests with singing and dancing.
>> CORRECT!

I love the dining room where Julie Andrews made all children cry with heartwarming words.
>> CORRECT!

I love the bedroom where all children got together and sing together to shake off their fears of thunder. 

>> I love the bedroom where all the children get together and sing together to shake off their fears of thunder.


I learned how to treat frightened children from Julie Andrews comforting them with encouragement.
>> CORRECT!

I love the balcony where Christopher Plummer confessed his love for Julie Andrews bravely in front of Eleanor Parker.
>> CORRECT!

More scenes blew my mind.
>> CORRECT!

I got a chance to come near the hill where Julie Andrews sang with children. 
>> CORRECT!

However, I was on a business trip. 
>> CORRECT!

I couldn't make time to go there.
>> CORRECT!

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