¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Losting My Dream Lense

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿ì
2022-03-16 399

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The biggest mistake I made is I lost my dream lense. I was trying to add some water in my lense bowl, but one side of my lense go through into the sink. However, it is 400,000won for each side. So I pay for it again.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Alex!

Oh, that's unfortunate. Maybe you were not able to control the water pressure. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

The biggest mistake I made is I lost my dream lense. 
>> The biggest mistake that I have made is when I lost my dream lenses. 

I was trying to add some water in my lense bowl, but one side of my lense go through into the sink. 
>> I was trying to add some water in my lenses container and one of it fell through the sink. 

However, it is 400,000won for each side. So I pay for it again.
>> It is 400,00 won each so I need to buy one again. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118032 Should governments allow people to drink products that make... ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 1404
118031 Do you think it would be harder to live with a physical... ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 668
118030 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 549
118029 Fashion is important thing ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 831
118028 My Favorite Thing about Myself ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 1130
118027 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 1
118026 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 745
118025 2022.4.5 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 805
118024 Do you think fashion is important for people\'s lives? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 488
118023 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-06 2
118022 If you can plant a tree in your name, what tree will you plant? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 840
118021 4/5 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 502
118020 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 3
118019 What is your favorite healthy food? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 1
118018 What place would you like to visit soon? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 754
118017 Is it morally right to spend a lot of money on pets, rather than... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 1
118016 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 1
118015 Should governments allow people to drink products that make... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 462
118014 What kinds of drinks do you prefer when it\'s hot? Please... ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 498
118013 Children who start reading earlier in life, perform better later... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04