¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My Homeowrk

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: °­*¿ì
2022-03-16 612

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I can't get close to friends who are not close to me, and I, sometimes, act like I am not interested in making new friends. I do want to fix this habit, but it's really hard to fix.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kane!

You are more of an introvert and there is nothing wrong with that. But being sociable can be a big advantage to you when you get older. :) Try doing it gradually. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon

I can't get close to friends who are not close to me, and I, sometimes, act like I am not interested in making new friends. 
>>I can't get close to friends who are not close to me. I sometimes act like I am not interested in making new friends. 

I do want to fix this habit, but it's really hard to fix.
>> I want to fix this habit but it is really hard. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118595 Which one do you think is better, electronic books or... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 0
118594 Which one do you think is better, electronic books or... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 378
118593 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 381
118592 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 335
118591 What first impression has others on you? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 1
118590 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 2
118589 Which one do you think is better, electronic books or... ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 484
118588 My favorite food ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 3
118587 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 1
118586 How to overcome stress ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 311
118585 universities ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 452
118584 modern people busy À±*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 494
118583 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 464
118582 What is your best experience in life? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 515
118581 202.4.27 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 416
118580 Why do you think people started living in cities? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 1
118579 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 379
118578 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 429
118577 International sporting events are costly and bring problems to... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 0
118576 Which one do you think is better, electronic books or... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-04-28 368

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04