¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you want to change something in your appearance? Why or why not? Explain in detail.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-03-18 1282

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I do. I want to change my nose because my nose is not good on my face. I have a big mouth and medium eyes. My nose is medium, too. Instead of medium size of nose, I want to have a proper size of nose. I think that most people want to change a section of their face. I don't think these are serious problem. I just hope everyone, including me does thier best to love themselves.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kimberly! 

Yes, we should be contented with what we have in life. Our appearance brings us character. It's our identity. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Yes, I do. 
>> CORRECT

I want to change my nose because my nose is not good on my face. 
>> I want to change my nose because it doesn't look good on my face. 

I have a big mouth and medium eyes. 
>> I have a big mouth and medium-sized eyes. 

My nose is medium, too. 
>> CORRECT

Instead of medium size of nose, I want to have a proper size of nose. 
>> Instead of having a medium-sized of nose, I want to have a normal-sized one. 

I think that most people want to change a section of their face. 
>> CORRECT

I don't think these are serious problem. 
>> I don't think these are serious problems. 

I just hope everyone, including me does thier best to love themselves.
>> I just hope everyone, including me, will do their best to love themselves.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120611 Homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 3058
120610 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 991
120609 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 0
120608 Why is gambling addictive? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 0
120607 [Homework] Should housework only be assigned to one person? Why... ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1
120606 the disadvantages of being phsically attractive ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 2
120605 What do you think is the best season to visit your country? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 1301
120604 What is one thing you have never done but would like to do? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 1291
120603 Aside from necessities, what one thing could you not go a day... ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 889
120602 Can you think of some disadvantages of being monolingual? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 2
120601 Jul 6th,2022 ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 796
120600 Do you enjoy visiting famous restaurants that are viral/popular... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 3
120599 If you see a person that looks lost or needs help on the street,... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 2
120598 Describe the closest neighbor you could think of. Mention how... ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 969
120597 Aside from necessities, what one thing could you not go a day... À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 1
120596 How can you make an interesting situation? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-10 3
120595 . ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-09 973
120594 Is your government good at dealing with and tackling social... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-09 3
120593 What illness are you afraid of the most and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-09 982
120592 Do you think monkeypox will be as severe as Covid-19? Why or why... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-09 1447

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04