¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you want to change something in your appearance? Why or why not? Explain in detail.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-03-18 820

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I do. I want to change my nose because my nose is not good on my face. I have a big mouth and medium eyes. My nose is medium, too. Instead of medium size of nose, I want to have a proper size of nose. I think that most people want to change a section of their face. I don't think these are serious problem. I just hope everyone, including me does thier best to love themselves.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kimberly! 

Yes, we should be contented with what we have in life. Our appearance brings us character. It's our identity. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Yes, I do. 
>> CORRECT

I want to change my nose because my nose is not good on my face. 
>> I want to change my nose because it doesn't look good on my face. 

I have a big mouth and medium eyes. 
>> I have a big mouth and medium-sized eyes. 

My nose is medium, too. 
>> CORRECT

Instead of medium size of nose, I want to have a proper size of nose. 
>> Instead of having a medium-sized of nose, I want to have a normal-sized one. 

I think that most people want to change a section of their face. 
>> CORRECT

I don't think these are serious problem. 
>> I don't think these are serious problems. 

I just hope everyone, including me does thier best to love themselves.
>> I just hope everyone, including me, will do their best to love themselves.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117699 Writing Task(Mar 23th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 312
117698 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 6
117697 Why do you think conversations are important? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 780
117696 How many hours of sleep do you need and why? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 1
117695 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 385
117694 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 2
117693 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 641
117692 What takes up most of your time? Do you think you manage your... ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 0
117691 If you could have any food right now, what would it be? And why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 580
117690 Without weekends ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 1
117689 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 592
117688 If you could have any food right now, what would it be? And why? ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 1500
117687 Would you rather live in a house or an apartment? Why or why... ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 805
117686 Good evening °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 844
117685 Which one is better, studying abroad or studying in South Korea?... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 945
117684 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 698
117683 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 984
117682 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 1
117681 House and apartment. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 928
117680 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-24 977

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04