¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My weakness

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2022-03-18 1016

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

These day, I have a lot of thinking.
I don't know why I feel so strange.
feel like one of part heart is empty and lonely.
Now I think I'm in a difficult situation mentally.
I'm really busy, but I don't know how to deal with this empty feeling.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Anne! 

I notice that too. This has been your problem for a while. It actually saddens me. We go through these kinds of phases in our lives but don't worry. Everything will eventually make sense. Just be patient and focus on yourself. I'm always here for you. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

These day, I have a lot of thinking.
>> These days, I haven't been thinking a lot. 

I don't know why I feel so strange.
>> CORRECT

feel like one of part heart is empty and lonely.
>> It feels like one part of my heart is lonely and empty. 

Now I think I'm in a difficult situation mentally.
>> I think that I'm in a difficult situation mentally. 

I'm really busy, but I don't know how to deal with this empty feeling.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120036 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 1632
120035 Do you like shopping for yourself or for others? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 5
120034 Which one is more comfortable: living in the urban areas or... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 818
120033 my location (Since the Opic is a speaking test, I will do my... ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 978
120032 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 792
120031 What can you say about the fathers taking more part in caring... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 1132
120030 I\'ve never tried it, but I want to try it. ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 838
120029 Are there any activities that you used to do but don\'t do... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 1559
120028 Can you name restaurants in your area that serve food from other... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 0
120027 Family responsibilities, zombi movie. À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 821
120026 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 1
120025 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 1002
120024 What kind of food will you not eat? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 853
120023 No kids ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 968
120022 Weakness ½É*Çý ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 4
120021 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 775
120020 Is there a kind of drama that you will never watch? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 1000
120019 Do you think it¡¯s easy or difficult to find time to exercise... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 659
120018 Would you ever consider having your parents live with you when... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 0
120017 Why do you think it\'s difficult for people to talk about... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04