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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

I want to be seated in a non-smoking area.

작성자: 김*준
2022-03-21 718

회원님의 영작문

Of course, I want to be seated in a non-smoking area. Because I have never smoked a cigarette and I hate cigarette smoke. so, I really don’t want to be seated in a smoking area.

In KOREA, People shouldn’t smoke indoors such as all buildings or all transportations and more.
In particular if you are with someone who doesn’t smoke, you shouldn’t smoke near them. Almost all Koreans do that. I think it is a good culture and good common sense. But it wasn’t like this about 10 years ago and nowadays some people don’t follow this common sense. I think this is unavoidable.

Although smoking isn’t good for health. I think smoking is a personal choice. If we acknowledge and take care of each other, more people will be happy.
Anyway, I think, If possible, it is better not to smoke.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello!


Thank you so much for answering this homework! I am a bit envious of the system that you mentioned. Here in the Philippines, there are allotted spaces for vaping, but I think smoking areas are not so common. Some people on public roads still smoke despite being in crowds. I really hate the smell of smoke too.


Anyway, for today, there are still words that are better joined as one. We don't usually use 'And, Because, But" etc at the beginning of the sentence. If so, probably, you can join the second sentence wioth the first sentence as a second clause.


Again, great job! You explained it so well.

-Teacher Violet.



Of course, I want to be seated in a non-smoking area. Because I have never smoked a cigarette and I hate cigarette smoke. 

>> Of course, I want to be seated in a non-smoking area because I have never smoked a cigarette and I hate cigarette smoke. 


so, I really don’t want to be seated in a smoking area.

>> So, I really don’t want to be seated in a smoking area.


In KOREA, People shouldn’t smoke indoors such as all buildings or all transportations and more.

>> In Korea, people shouldn’t smoke indoors such as in all buildings or all transportation, and more.


In particular if you are with someone who doesn’t smoke, you shouldn’t smoke near them. 

>> In particular, if you are with someone who doesn’t smoke, you shouldn’t smoke near them. 


Almost all Koreans do that. 

>> CORRECT!

I think it is a good culture and good common sense. But it wasn’t like this about 10 years ago and nowadays some people don’t follow this common sense. 

>> I think it is a good culture and good common sense but it wasn’t like this about 10 years ago and nowadays some people don’t follow this common sense. 


I think this is unavoidable.

>> CORRECT!

Although smoking isn’t good for health. I think smoking is a personal choice. 

>> CORRECT!

If we acknowledge and take care of each other, more people will be happy.

>> CORRECT!

Anyway, I think, If possible, it is better not to smoke.

>> CORRECT!
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지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

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전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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