¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Mar 22th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-03-23 673

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What are the advantages or disadvantages of modern medicine?
One advantage is that we can get over easily in a short period with modern medicine. There¡¯re millions of drugs we can buy at a drugstore or even at a convenience store.
However, the disadvantage comes from the same fact that we can buy nearly any medicine within 10 minutes, no matter where we are. Human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, soar throat, ant etc as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strength self-defense and immune system.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, U Seung! 

You are right! Having the modern medicine makes it easier for us to access it, especially during the emergencies. We should also not be too dependent on medicines because it can weaken our body at the same time.

Thank you for sharing!

~T. Roanne ^_^
=========================================
One advantage is that we can get over easily in a short period with modern medicine. 
>> Correct! 
There¡¯re millions of drugs we can buy at a drugstore or even at a convenience store.
>> Correct! 
However, the disadvantage comes from the same fact that we can buy nearly any medicine within 10 minutes, no matter where we are. 
>> Correct! 
Human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, soar throat, ant etc as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. 
>> The human body needs a kind of symptoms, like high fever, cough, sore throat, ant etc. as a way of self cure and a certain level of immunity. 
But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strength self-defense and immune system.
>> But buying and taking the medicine easily, we don¡¯t allow our bodies to have those symptoms that are necessary to strengthen self-defense and immune system
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116690 Do you think marriage is important? Why or why not? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1684
116689 What K-pop song would you recommend to someone who is not a... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 564
116688 Feb 22th, 2022 ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 457
116687 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1180
116686 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 4
116685 Why do you think family is important? ¾ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 4
116684 hw 2.22 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 757
116683 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 2
116682 gift! ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 3
116681 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 577
116680 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1
116679 Korea to make public food prices at franchise to tame inflation À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1
116678 kits ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 746
116677 Tell me the time when you had to prioritize ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1185
116676 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1552
116675 What physical feature attracts you the most? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1
116674 2022.2.21 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 892
116673 2022.2.18 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1104
116672 Homework ½Å*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 0
116671 homework ¹Ú*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2022-02-22 1026

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04