¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*ÁÖ
2022-03-23 520

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK:
What should your government do about your problem of an old age society? Share your answer in a few sentences.

According to news, the population has been decreasing since 2020. The government keeps pay attention to old people in order to solve the difficult problem.

It seem to be an error in my feedback. Some of feedbacks is same sentences. Could you check this? Thank you.

I hope your arthritis gets better soon. Have a meaningful day too. Donna!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Hae Ju!

First of all, my apologies again for the same feedback on your sentences. They have been  rectified on your page. Here they are as well: 

1. Yeah, I'm back to work from last Friday.
>> Correct!
>> Yeah, I have been back to work since last Friday.

4. Good point is I go to the Pilates today.
>> The good (point/ thing) is I will go to Pilates today.

6. I really want to travel the world with ship.
>> Correct!
Or:  I really want to travel the world with a ship.

7. Recently, I watched the YouTube.
>> Recently, I watched YouTube.

I am not sure why I missed to check so many sentences today but I promise to  never commit the same mistakes again. 

Anyway, my foot is absolutely alright now! Like magic, it disappeared!

Meanwhile, here on your answer, I agree with you that the older people need to be convinced that they can have children and the government will support them. Thank you very much for your time in reading your sentences on your page. I hope that the grammar suggestions can help you in one way or another to memorize grammar patterns.

Take care and see you again on Friday!

Good night! ^^

-T. Donna =)

According to news, the population has been decreasing since 2020. 
>> Correct!

The government keeps pay attention to old people in order to solve the difficult problem.
>> The government should keep paying attention to old people in order to solve the difficult problem.

It seem to be an error in my feedback. Some of feedbacks is same sentences. 
>>  There seems to be an error in my feedback. Some of the feedbacks are the same sentences. 

Could you check this? Thank you.
>> Correct!

I hope your arthritis gets better soon. Have a meaningful day too. Donna!
>> Correct!


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117435 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 2
117434 What are your weaknesses? Explain in detail. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 0
117433 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 0
117432 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 515
117431 What is your favorite place? Why? ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1
117430 Do you prefer reading, listening, speaking, or writing lessons?... Àü*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 607
117429 What are your weaknesses? Explain in detail. Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 291
117428 Do you prefer spending time with family or friends? ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1321
117427 What is the most interesting hobby in your family? ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 698
117426 Writing Task(Mar 15th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 502
117425 Use each expression in a sentence ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1003
117424 Who is your favorite book character? ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1031
117423 Thank you! Donna! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 731
117422 Good evening! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 792
117421 Because of this situation ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 995
117420 My Homeowrk °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 561
117419 Brushing ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 10
117418 Mama\'s boy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1
117417 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 226
117416 Favorite book character ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 676

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04