¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think you are now successful, or still unsuccessful?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-04-05 473

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The answer to this question depends on what criteria I use to decide whether my life is successful or not.

When it comes to happiness or life satisfaction, I think I become successful because my life has been good to me so far. I have three children to make me happy. Sometimes looking after three children is no picnic but it's very rewarding to me. A couple of days ago, I said to myself, "What if I hadn't had these wonderful children?" Now I can't thank God enough for His gifts - three children.

However, when it comes to wealth, I am still unsuccessful because I still don't have as much money as I expect. Recently I am planning on my life in my 50s when I won't be tied to work for my salary. My wife and I are going to have early retirement before the 50s and we want to enjoy our remaining lives together. Our couple hasn't enjoyed our lives since our first daughter's birth. Therefore, we want to be away from our daily routine and enjoy our lives before it's too late or old.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Steve!

Thank you for answering this question. Good job by the way! Success is subjective and has no standard. It's really good that you laid down your definition of success. Your children are really lucky to have you as parents because you are planning for your own retirement and how to have the best life then. Most parents in the Philippines, especially those in poverty do not think about that nor do they do anything about it. Instead, they rely on their children to support them in their old age. With that said, their children are now referred to as the "sandwich generation" because they have to support their parents or their original family, as well as their newly made family (if ever they got married and had kids). 

For your answer, there weren't many corrections! Good job! Please observe when to use the apostrophe.

Keep it up Steve! This is great.
-Teacher Violet.

The answer to this question depends on what criteria I use to decide whether my life is successful or not.

-CORRECT!

When it comes to happiness or life satisfaction, I think I become successful because my life has been good to me so far. 

-CORRECT!

I have three children to make me happy. 

-CORRECT!

Sometimes looking after three children is no picnic but it's very rewarding to me. 

-CORRECT!

A couple of days ago, I said to myself, "What if I hadn't had these wonderful children?" 

-CORRECT!

Now, I can't thank God enough for His gifts - three children.

-CORRECT!

However, when it comes to wealth, I am still unsuccessful because I still don't have as much money as I expect.

-CORRECT!

Recently I am planning on my life in my 50s when I won't be tied to work for my salary. 

>> Recently, I have been planning for my life in my 50¡¯s when I won't be tied to work for my salary. 


My wife and I are going to have early retirement before the 50s and we want to enjoy our remaining lives together. 

-CORRECT!

Our couple hasn't enjoyed our lives since our first daughter's birth. 

-CORRECT!

Therefore, we want to be away from our daily routine and enjoy our lives before it's too late or old.

-CORRECT!


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119154 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 1
119153 Any foods ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 3
119152 In your opinion, what habits should you have to have a... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 0
119151 Market È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 1
119150 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 499
119149 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 448
119148 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 515
119147 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 444
119146 5.18 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 516
119145 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 370
119144 What is Korea\'s best tourist attraction? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 3
119143 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 1
119142 My lifetime dream. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 536
119141 Driving under influence of alcohol is a big problem these days.... ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 504
119140 Why I like meeting new people. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 521
119139 Are you worried about your future? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 513
119138 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 299
119137 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 442
119136 Writing Task(May 17th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 470
119135 5/18 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-18 537

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04