¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your opinion about people who have tattoos? Would you personally want to have one? Why or wh

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-04-05 850

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't have my own opinion about it, but I think it is just a choice of the people.
Actually, we dress up and we decorate a lot of things on our bodies.
For instance, we have a cool hair cut or a nice and unique hair cut.
And I think the tattoos are same as a hair cut.
We all have a right to decorate ourselves, and it includes tattoos.
Because of these reason, I think it is just a personal choice.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! 

People's opinions about this is always different. Either way, we still need to respect people who have tattoos the same on how we treat others who don't. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I don't have my own opinion about it, but I think it is just a choice of the people.
>> I don't have my own opinion about it, but I think it's a personal choice for people. 

Actually, we dress up and we decorate a lot of things on our bodies.
>> Actually, we dress up and decorate our bodies with a lot of things. 

For instance, we have a cool hair cut or a nice and unique hair cut.
>> For instance, we cut and color our hair. 

And I think the tattoos are same as a hair cut.
>> And I think the tattoos are the same as hair cuts. 

We all have a right to decorate ourselves, and it includes tattoos.
>> We all have the rights to decorate ourselves, and that includes tattoos.

Because of these reason, I think it is just a personal choice.
>> Because of these reason, I think it is a personal choice.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119926 the complaints ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 2
119925 What tradition or custom from your country would you like to... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 827
119924 Did you have any typhoon-related experiences when you were... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 0
119923 Memorable Summer Vacation ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 588
119922 What do you do when you know that someone is lying to you? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 4
119921 Describe your favorite video game. ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 957
119920 Talk about your most memorable summer vacation ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 921
119919 What do you do to push yourself when you¡¯re feeling lazy? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 877
119918 What is the most expensive thing that you would want to buy and... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-17 1211
119917 [Homework] Q. If you had more free time, what would you do with... ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 1
119916 6/16 HOMEWORK(???????????????????????????????????) ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 1243
119915 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 1126
119914 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 0
119913 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 0
119912 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 2
119911 What are the advantages of starting a new job in a new company? ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 1307
119910 Which German places would you like to visit? Why? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 693
119909 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 1
119908 Homewrork ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 735
119907 What are some strange foreign customs that you have heard of? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-16 837

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04